1 am || dreamnotfound

twenty - one

without even thinking, clay gripped george's arms and pulled them down in front of him and right in few, was rows of fresh cuts, jagging around his wrists and up his forearms.

george tried to pull away but clay held his grip tightly. "what the.. why?"

george grit his teeth. "because i fucking deserve it, clay." he tried to pull away again but clay didn't let him, the blond's heart sinking by the second as damned tears pricked his eyes.

"what? you don't fucking deserve this!" clay exclaimed, loosening his grip but not enough for george to yank away.

"yes, yes i fucking do, clay. fucking realize that," george hissed.

"why?" clay asked, a desperate tone painting his voice.

"i just fucking do, okay?" george yanked hard enough for clay to release. the brunet stood up quickly, trying to make his way to the door but clay gripped the sleeve of the sweater, pulling the boy back so they were nearly touching.

"don't just run the fuck away 'cause that doesn't do anything, okay?" clay said, keeping eye contact with george as they other tried to look away.

george chewed on his lip, no words able to slip past except for one broken breath. clay's heart broke at that and he pulled the boy into his lap, wrapping his arms around his slim waist.

the brunet buried his face under clay's chin and whispered, "i'm sorry. fuck, i'm sorry clay." and sobs shook his body.

clay brought a hand to george's chocolate hair and ran his finger through the locks, shushing quietly and muttering, "no, don't apologize, but... please, for me, could you try...." he couldn't find the words, but george understood and nodded.

after a minute of silence, george let out a choked laugh. "oh my god, i don't even know why i'm crying to hard."

clay chuckled, "don't worry 'bout it, hun."

he froze. george froze.

clay let out an awkward laugh. "that was not supposed to slip."

george giggled and hiccuped slightly. "i don't care."

they stayed there in silence as clay waited for george's hiccups to subdue into shaky breaths. clay's heart was beating so fucking fast he had a feeling that george could feel it, because they smaller boy was pressed into his chest.

soon enough, george had fallen asleep and clay's eyelids were drooping, fluttering as he tried to stay awake.

sighing, he shifted slightly. as he did so, george curled the fabric of clay's sweater in his slim fingers. clay froze at the movement, heart beat speeding up.

goddammit, the things this boy was beginning to do to him.

clay leaned his head against the headrest, eyes fluttering shut for a long moment before opening.

absently, he wrapped his arms around the sleeping boy tightly and let himself get comfortable as he yawned and shut his eyes, light eyelashes brushing his cheeks.

they stayed there.