Ice Blink

51: The Ice Blink

"There it is!" Amarok called.

"What? I can't see anything," Maliq snapped.

The euphoria of kayaking soon wore off. Their waterproofs kept them from getting soaked, but they were cold, their fingers stiff on the paddles despite their gloves, and Nuna's legs had turned painfully stiff. The sea was choppy and they had to keep swerving to avoid ice floes. Ice had formed close to the shore in patches, but the waves broke it up. They had stayed close to the coastline in fear of drifting too far and getting completely lost or stranded in open sea, but there was no sign of the glacier.

"Look where the sky meets the sea," Amarok said. "It's the ice blink."

Day bled into dusk, turning the cloudy sky dark blue, but there was a spectral glow on the horizon, as if the sea was birthing a new moon.

"It's beautiful," Nuna said.

"Beautiful, and a marker. The ice blink means there's a large frozen pack ahead, and I'm guessing it's our glacier."

Niju spoke for the first time since leaving the shore. "If we continue through the night, we might miss the opening. Let's find somewhere to make camp."

They spotted an area of coast which jutted out like a great grey owl's talon and headed towards it. Nuna brought her kayak close to Niju's. He looked reluctant.

"Seasick?" she teased.

"What? Oh," he smiled when he realised it was a joke, "no, I was just thinking."

"About?"

"The temple. The spirits. When Mortu and Annoatok were there, all they brought was destruction. But we brought music..."

"And? That's a good thing, right?"

"I was just wondering how much they found out, whether we know something they don't, or if it's the other way around. I wish I knew where Mortu was now."

"Me, too. I'd fight him one on one."

"I don't doubt that you would."

They brought their kayaks close to the shore and hopped out – the skinboats swaying dangerously at the last moment. They hauled everything out and made a hasty, cheerless shelter out of sloping rocks and snow.

The mood turned tense as everyone tried not to think about their monumental task, which Nuna still didn't feel properly equipped to perform.

"I'll keep watch first," Niju said, pulling a bow and quiver from one of the packs. "They'll see the smoke from our fire if they're anywhere nearby."

The night wore on, and she couldn't sleep. Even though she didn't want to leave the fire, she wriggled out of her sleeping bag and quietly left the shelter.

Light glancing off the ice around them painted Niju silver and blue. He was watching the ice blink, which was still unearthly pale in the blackness.

"Nuna. Why are you here?"

That stopped her short. Why was she here, even though her instincts told her to soak up every possible scrap of warmth before tomorrow?

Instead of waiting for her to find her voice, Niju strode slowly away from the camp, and Nuna wondered if she was imagining the subtle invitation in the lingering pace of his steps. She followed, and they halted on the edge of the talon of rock jutting out over the sea.

"Are you scared?" Niju asked softly.

"No." Her resolve faltered. "Yes. The odds of us surviving are..."

"I've watched you since you arrived in Illulik. It was incredible that you even made it there with no supplies after the attack on your tribe, even more so when you recovered from hypothermia with nothing but your own strength. And then you, a woman from Mid-Ice, have held your own against everything you've encountered so far."

"Watching me from afar?" Nuna kept her voice light, but boiling water was filling her body. "What are you trying to do, get me into bed?"

"This is hardly the time." His lips quirked in a smile. "But I'd be lying if I said no."

Instantly her thoughts scattered in a wild panic. Was he joking? Surely he was joking. She couldn't tell.

"Charmer," she murmured, struggling to appear composed.

"Nuna." The name was a prayer on his lips as the sea crashed around them. "I've never met anyone like you."

"That's funny." Nuna couldn't get her breath. "I've liked you – a lot – ever since Illulik, but I thought you didn't feel the same way." Equal parts joy and fear crashed through her. She didn't know what to do. Perhaps she should kiss him now. She probably should, but she was rooted to the spot. She had fought ahkiyyini and Ikkuma, faced Jarl Einar and defied him, but now her courage had deserted her.

Do it. Just do it.

Damning the consequences, Nuna closed the distance between them and pressed her lips against his. It was a feather-light touch, a whisper of a kiss, a promise, but Niju stepped back.

Her head was spinning. You idiot. Didn't he just say this wasn't the time? Nuna swallowed hard, trying to push the pain down, unable to speak.

"We shouldn't." It sounded like Niju was forcing the words out. "I... I'm a member of the Circle, you're a Mid-Ice tribeswoman. When this is over, I... I just can't." He began to turn away but Nuna gripped his arm, her heart pounding, unable to watch him leave.

"Why not?" she whispered.

A wave crashed violently against the rocks as they stared at each other, a taut thread between them.

"Niju?"

The thread snapped when Niju's resolve crumbled.

He caught her waist with one hand, her face in the other, and his lips met hers, sparking a wave of heat which rolled through her, thrilling along her nerves. This time there was no uncertainty. He pressed her against him and her back arched. He leaned with the movement, deepening the kiss, and Nuna clung to the back of his parka because it was the only thing keeping her upright. The ground swayed beneath her feet, the sky whirled above. She had not realised it would feel this way: golden, still and yet chaotic at the same time, her heart so full it seemed ready to burst. His body, so warm and strong, holding hers up as they melded together, melting into each other like ice in fire.

Niju's fingers splayed against her lower back and a gasp jumped from her throat, a breath against his soft lips. The kiss was slow, hot. Fog filled her brain, disrupted her thoughts. Lightning crackled along her skin.

Niju drew back gently, still supporting Nuna for an extra moment as if he knew he had to let her regain her balance. Her breath was ragged, her heart in her mouth, blood pulsing through her ears.

Niju ran a hand over his face. It was shaking. "We shouldn't have done that."

Nuna tilted her head in confusion, still reeling, still struggling to function. "What's wrong? Everything you just said... I don't understand," she whimpered. The terrible pain began to rise again. Had she just made a mistake?

"I meant it. I meant everything. I'll explain when we get the shard out of the glacier, I promise."

It wasn't good enough. She wanted an explanation now, but if he wasn't ready to tell her yet... "All right. I trust you."

"Thank you."

Nuna walked unsteadily back to the shelter. Her legs had forgotten how to work.

"Sleep well," he whispered after her.

Heat still pounded through her core when she slipped back inside, but she told herself Niju was right. They couldn't distract themselves from our task, not now, when everything was so crucial. She could still feel the ghost sensation of his touch as she curled into her sleeping bag, watching the fire.