Nightmares (HP) (Drarry)

thirty one: allegiances, reprise

Harry visits Albus Dumbledore in his office a week before Voldemort is to raid the Ministry. To be asking the man that damned him for help again is something he hates himself for. If he could go to anyone else, he would. He is not here by any choice of his own.

But he is here.

Albus looks at  him with the same grandfatherly smile at always and gestures for Harry to sit down. Harry, done taking orders, small or otherwise, stands. "Dumbledore," he greets sharply.

"My boy," says Dumbledore, "It has been quite some time since you've agreed to see me."

"That it has."

"Would you like some tea?"

"No."

Dumbledore smiles and summons himself a cup. "Suit yourself, then." Harry watches Dumbledore and remembers every other time he has been sat down, served tea, and told a lot of nothing. He knows so much and tells so little. He wants to send Harry to his death.

On a body of his fallen comrades, he now stands.

He thinks all this and then wonders why he hadn't turned his back sooner. But he's back, now, in Albus's office, asking for help again. He's back and he (hates himself for it) feels like he's standing on a pile of corspes, too. 

"I ask four favours," Harry states.

"Do tell," Dumbledore says, almost conversationally, but Harry can tell, by means other than fucking mind reading, that he is paying intense attention. He can feel the disconnect between them, thick like syrup, and now Harry has returned. How could he not be interested?

"Do you know what happens in a week's time?"

"OWL exams?" Dumbledore says.

Harry nods. "Yes. And in a week's time, a raid will occur. Voldemort will move. He'll try to steal the prophecy from the Ministry of Magic. I ask, if you decide to fight back, that you leave Sirius Black be."  A deeply troubled look flashes on his face. "My boy--"

"No, listen," said Harry and he surprises himself by how much urgency his voice conveys. "Sirius -- he... he trusts you. A lot. And he'll think it's to protect me, but it won't be. The only true way he can protect me is to live -- do you understand? If you ask him to fight, he will. Please. I beg of you not to ask him to fight if that's your choice of action."

Dumbledore crosses his fingers together, eyeing Harry over his half moon spectacles. "Very well," he says. "But I do have to ask -- how do you know all of this, Harry?"

"Make your own theories," says Harry. He'll probably believe that Harry is in contact with Death Eaters, or that Harry is one himself. It doesn't matter much. Dumbledore cannot afford to kill him himself. "I don't owe you information. I do not owe you trust you do not deserve."

"Of course I trust you, my boy," Dumbledore starts, and something in Harry breaks like a damn.

"Then what's the prophecy?" he snaps. "Why haven't you let me in on Order meetings - why did you keep me in the dark for the first fucking decade of my life? Why didn't you tell me that Sirius Black hadn't killed my parents -- because Sirius said that he had consulted with you on the matter. Why did you know I was hearing things no one else had when no one else did? 

"You don't trust me, because you don't tell me shit."  You know so much and tell so little.

"I never meant to--"

"I know," says Harry, quietly. "But that doesn't make it any better."

A heavy silence. "I am sorry," Dumbledore says, and he is, Harry can tell. "What is the other favours you wished to ask?"

Harry straightens his back. "Right. I wish for me and Draco Malfoy to stay in Hogwarts over the summer."

"The blood wards--"

"Have never kept me safe before," says Harry. "If I really need them, then we can move my relatives here for some time, yes? If that would work."

"It might," says Dumbledore. "May I ask why you wish to be moved in the first place? Privet Drive is your home."

"It never has been," says Harry. "But being moved to Hogwarts is not just for my protection -- it's for Draco's, too."

"Do tell how, son."

"Voldemort will want to give him the Dark Mark over the summer. If we can stow away Draco, and his family, if necessary, we can keep them safe."

Dumbledore seems to perk up in his seat. "The Mafloys wish to join the Order?"

"No," says Harry. "They wish to join me."

Dumbledore stares at him, and there's this sort of sadness in his eyes that Harry wants to put a fist through, and he wonders if he should give trust he does not receive. "Okay," he says. "But I find it unsafe to stay at a place as large as Hogwarts, as well-known as Hogwarts. Perhaps you and young Draco' family could stay at Grimmulad Place -- with your relatives staying there for sometime, as well, of course."

"Thank you," he says. It's some time away from his relative's cruelty, because even if he is to be around them, they cannot hurt him under watching eyes. It is also safer than Privet Drive -- no Dementors will visit them there. 

Draco hasn't exactly cleared the deal with his family, but once he announces he's not with the Dark, they will have to choose between their son and Voldemort. Hopefully it will be an easy enough decision to make.

Most importantly, though, he and Draco will be able to touch hands daily and keep the nightmares -- and Voldemort's prying eyes -- at bay.

"For my final favour, I wish for me and Draco to be allowed a trip to Knockturn Alley before the school year ends." He needs to purchase Fyrefly to destroy the Diam, and, hopefully, more horcruxes than just that. They need to do it at Hogwarts, because Grimmuald Place is too filled with people. The occupants would be in potential danger, and aren't entirely trustworthy.

Dumbledore agrees and Harry lingers, just a moment. He wants to warn him about the Gaunt ring. Wants to say that no matter what he might see, it is not worth it. That Harry's hatred for him does not extend that far.

But the vindictive part of Harry is not worn. He turns his back and leaves Dumbledore in his office, sipping on cold tea.

a/n

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