XX.
- Trish -
Dying has been relentlessly filling my thoughts – deep wounds and tremendous lacerations have been carved like it was pieces of my history. But, not today.
My breath of fresh air is here -Cate's here
I heard footsteps approaching from behind, and felt a couple of kisses on my nape as her arms have wrapped me tightly like a Turkish burrito.
Oh, back hugs for me were truly divine
"Good morning my love, why are you up so early?" She uttered with her raspy morning voice, ah I feel like my knees were getting weaker and weaker
I turned my body, now fully facing this glorious woman who has been clinging to me nonstop since last night.
"You want coffee?" I looked at her and those blue soothing irises have met mine. The time has stopped, looking at this exemplary and somewhat faultless woman was something as staring into a picture-perfect picturesque
"Mmmm, you haven't said good morning to me yet. I'm offended" she answered dramatically
I giggled lightly and kissed her forehead as a payment "Hmmm, I think I just fell in love again" I uttered which made her froze and her eyes glint
"Mmmm, I think you're turning into a softie" she replied
"Why? You don't want it? Okay fine, never mind then" I shrugged, and as I tried to free myself, she placed her hands on the countertop leaving inches between our bodies and looked at me once again, this time deeply
"I love you" she slowly uttered
This time it was me who froze, I barely cannot let out even a single word. Fuck, I slowly exhaled and was somewhat relieved that Cate wasn't mad. I was too agitated with what she just said that I cannot give her those three words back
For now
---
After such morning madness, Cate and I have just decided to spend the day watching movies, talking about ourselves and work-related stuff, and me cooking the whole day for whatever I can manage to pull out of the fridge. Luckily, I did some grocery shopping yesterday because she constantly gets hungry after every meal.
like seriously?
I sat beside her on the couch and closed my eyes for a moment until she noticed my behavior and spoke
"Baby, what's wrong?" she asked resting her right hand on my thigh
"I've been cooking all day, I'm exhausted" I replied still not looking at her
"Mhmm, you don't have to cook, I can just eat you" she answered back seductively, while her fingers slowly made their way down from my thigh and up to my waist
"Wow, bold move Blanchett" I replied, raising my brows
Her touches have been sending electric shivers to my entirety and I could literally devour this clingy baby right here, right now. But, I couldn't and I wouldn't until we clear things up that I knew we both were avoiding
"Uh, do you wanna do something else aside from what you're trying to do right now?" I asked and tried redirecting the topic to something else
"Uhm no, I'm fine. I'll just sit here then" She answered and moved farther away from me
fuck, what did I do now?
She looked sad and weary, I'm not sure if it is because of what I said or that she didn't get what she wanted or is it anything else because obviously, her mood changed and totally different from earlier
"Honey, are you mad?" I threw a question in her direction but didn't get any response
The silence grew larger as Cate didn't take any actions that would create any noises. Ughhh, I suck at this. I didn't intentionally want her to be upset but I just can't make any sexual contact with her until I made sure that we're both ready
Her phone chimed and she was then too fixated on whoever she was exchanging messages with. She suddenly got up and fixed her clothes
"I need to go" she spoke, breaking the silence that was filling the spaces between us and the entire loft
"Hey" I reached for her hand and held it tightly but she brushed it off of me
"I--I'll text you later, I'm meeting up with Lily in less than an hour" she replied with so much less enthusiasm
and who the fuck is Lily? damn, bet she's pretty
I let go of her hand, she might have more important things to do with —Lily anyway than spending her remaining hours with me before she heads back to work tomorrow
"But--- I thought-- uh, okay" I replied giving her a sly smile
She immediately collected her things and I was left there, still clueless with gnawing jealousy rapidly building in my insides. The door has swung open, leaving the floor space empty and once again quiet which was an indication that she has left.
