Cancer Secrets (on hold)

Chapter Eight

The last time I went to the hospital, it really got to me. It finally hit me.

“I have cancer,” I whispered to myself in the mirror for the billionth time since I had gotten home. It couldn’t be true. I didn’t believe it. Even though I had just been through hell the day before after the doctor told us, I still didn’t believe it. This had to be a horrible dream and I was soon going to be woken up. I pinched my arm, nope not dreaming because I was still awake, that definitely hurt, and I still felt like crap.

Maybe if I say it two billion times instead of one I’d believe it. “I have cancer,” I looked at my face and I could tell now that it had already taken a toll on me. I was sort of pale and I definitely had lost weight even though I already was kind of skinny. I twisted my hair around my finger still looking in the mirror. I couldn’t imagine losing my hair to the treatments, either.

I took a deep breath. “I’m Allie Fields and I have cancer,” I said for the third time not totally looking at my mirror. I heard a gasp and then I looked in the mirror. Daniel. I turned around to see his beautiful face and allowed the tears to finally fall after keeping them hidden. He wasn’t supposed to hear that. He came into the bathroom and I collapsed in his arms crying my eyes out. “I have cancer,” I muttered one last time before I drifted off to sleep in his arms.

~*~*~

When I opened my eyes, I was still in Daniel's arms. He wasn't sleeping just playing with my hair. I sighed, I didn't know what to say now that my secret was actually out.

"I forgot you were coming over," I muttered into his chest. I wasn't sure how he'd take this news, it's not something little, it's major! It could be life changing, literally.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, completely ignoring my previous statement. I shrugged.

"Don't lie, please," he begged. I finally sat up and looked into his blue eyes, they were holding the same exact sorrow and pitiful look my mother's held and it killed me inside. I didn't want him to feel sorry or bad for me, I just wanted everything to be the same for him and I, to be my best friend and boyfriend.

"I was scared. I didn't act, or at least I tried not to act it, but I could only hold it in for so long. That's the first time I had cried since I found out. I don't want you to feel sorry for me," I said, never taking my gaze off of his. He was now stroking my cheek in a comforting way. It made everything feel ten times better.

"Do you think that little of me that I would only be staying with you out of pity?" He was hurt, I could tell just by the tone of his voice although the expression on his face gave me all the reassurance of how he was feeling.

"It's not that, Daniel," I said choking back the tears. I wasn't an emotional person, I felt like a failure when I was vulnerable like this. "It's just I didn't want you to feel sorry for me and it be a constant problem in our relationship. I wanted to just go on in life, acting as if it were the same."

He leaned down and kissed my forehead. "How about for today, we just forget everything?" Daniel suggested, brushing the dark strands of my hair that had fallen into my face, away.

That actually sounded it really great. "Sounds great. What did you have in mind?"

"A party," he smiled.

"A party? On a Sunday?" I asked confused. The party that he had in mind typically wasn't thrown on a Sunday.

"Yeah, tomorrow we don't have school for those teacher staff days, or whatever, so Noelle's throwing a party and treating today as a Saturday."

I smiled. That was such a Noelle thing to do.

"A party sounds good to me," I said truthfully, kissing him on the lips. He chuckled and pulled me up from off of my floor in my room.

"I smell your mom's food," he whispered in my ear which made me giggle. I didn't realize how badly I needed a night out, a night where I wouldn't be alone to have crazy thoughts roam in my mind.

"Well, it's about that time for dinner," I said back, gripping his hand and taking him down the steps.

"That smells fantastic, Mrs. Fields," Daniel said as we both made our way into the kitchen. Ian scoffed at Daniel's remark at the food. Daniel thought anything smelt good, other than being a teenage boy who eats like crazy, he loves home cooked meals since his mother, in the nicest terms, can't cook at all.

Mom sighed and looked up at Daniel. She had flour, or at least that's what it looked like on her forehead. "Daniel! How many times do I have to tell you, it's Molly! Jeez!"

"Sorry, Molly," he muttered. His cheeks had turned pink and he was now ruffling his hands through his hair, which he always did when he got nervous. Daniel was exactly the sort of guy every parent loves, he respects his elders, is polite, and really sweet. He just couldn't grasp the thought of being on a first name basis with someone who wasn't his age.

"Much better," she said smiling turning her attention away from us.

Dad came into the kitchen right then to start helping mom as much as he can. I say that because, he, like Daniel's parents, couldn't cook that well.

"So, kids, what's your guys' plans for the night?" dad asked all four of us.

"Nothing," Elijah said.

"Noelle's party," the three of us said in unison.

My mom dropped her spoon that was in her hand and looked up at me. "Are you sure that's such a go-," but my dad cut her off.

"That sounds like fun, kids," Dad said giving mom the look that said it was, indeed, a good idea.

"You haven't been out to a party in a while, Allie," Ian said in a strange tone.

"That's why I'm going out tonight," I told him back.

"Whatever, I don't think you're going to be able to handle it," he said cockily.

"Oh what does that mean?"

"Yeah, what does that mean?" my parents both said eyeing him.

Uh-oh.

He quickly recovered though. "Oh nothing. It's just Allie's a crazy girl and Noelle's parties are always so calm," he said sarcastically.

The words calm and Noelle in the same sentence were enough for all of us to burst into laughter. I hope tonight is going to be enough to get everything off my mind. I also hope I wouldn't regret it.

Please comment and vote, if you'd like! Next upate will be before or on 01/23  :)

-Hunter-Kylie <3