Never Love Again

10. Who will I Choose?

"Don't worry son. Your family is always here for you. Your father and I are handling the situation very well with the police."

"I do not trust the police neither do I trust those horrid professors. What are we to do with a marked and unwed child? I can barely walk the street without someone telling me how sorry they are for what happened to my son!"

I knew it was a mistake to have come here after my visit to the doctor with them. Dad always overreacted at any situation, often treating me like I'm some damsel in distress and my mom putting up with his tantrums. 

"Dad, I can take care of myself, you don't need to marry me off to someone..."

"Take care of yourself my ass! Didn't you hear what the doctors said? You need to find a pair as soon as possible! I don't care if it's your fated mate or not!"

"My dear, their times are not as easy as ours. No one will volunteer to be his pair unless we pay up a large sum for it. Besides, he is our son and marked boys have it hard."

"I'm not planning to have a baby!"

"It's too late now to not want it is it? You're womb is already forming and soon enough there will be subsequent heat cycles! For crying out loud, Mijin is much more masculine than you are! Why do you think we asked her to live with you?"

Damn the hormones... I wanted to scream at dad but I had to control my anger otherwise I'd go into heat again. The doctor had advised to redirect my anger by diverting my attention to something I liked or loved. At this point, all I wanted do was be around Niel. He had a way of feeding my spiritual essence, making me feel like I could keep going. I closed my eyes and imagined myself around him, cuddling, kissing, touching him. Maybe one day all these fantasies of mine will come to life. If only he wasn't with my sister, I'd have tried my luck with him...but who's to say I couldn't now when those two were in an open relationship?

"Look at you pretending to be calm when clearly, you're just as scared as we are." Dad startled me from my thoughts when he held my hand.  "Look son, do you have anyone willing to pair with you? We need to know before we can find someone for you."

When I stared at him blankly, he continued, "Your mother often told me people have to love their reflections in the mirror otherwise I wouldn't be able to feel good about myself and I'd like to advice you on the same. Things will not be easy from now on since your life has indeed changed completely. If you don't get paired, your heat frequencies will increase and you won't be able to have a normal life. Soon enough you'll go insane without a pair's primary scent to calm you down."

"Yes my love your father is speaking from experience." Mom stood behind dad and put her hands on his shoulder. I didn't miss the gentle squeeze she gave him to calm him down after which the tension on dad's face relaxed, his frown lines slowly disappearing as he formed a smile.

"Your father and I had it rough too. No one accepted our relationship since I'm the one who marked him and even though it was consensual, he had to be the one to carry you and Mijin. If you do not accept this reality, I'm afraid you'll hate yourself whenever you see your reflection. We were lucky to be fated mates and despite your case being different, with a pair whose scent your spiritual essence will accept, you'll be able to afford a normal life."

This was the first time I'd stared at my father's eyes this long. His were dark red, almost burgundy. Stan had been right. Comparing my eyes to my father's or anyone else who'd been marked first, mine were screaming for attention and anyone that looked my way could clearly guess I'd been marked multiple times...and my marking had been incomplete too.

"I...don't have anyone in mind."

"Tough luck! You wanted a life of solitude and now you got it son." Dad sighed then proceeded to pat my shoulder. "Your mother and I may not be able to smell your scent after we became fated, however, your sister complains of a sweet pungent scent coming from you. You need to find a way to hide it so unless you want to continue taking suppressants for the rest of your life, which I doubt will do much, pairing up with another is the best choice that has longevity."

My mind drifted back to Niel. He's the only one I genuinely felt like pairing up with and if this was the best solution, I'll have to have a very uncomfortable conversation with him and Mijin.

"From your loud silence, it appears we have no choice left." Dad said as he looked up at mom. "We have to ask Mijin to help us find a compatible pair for his brother. She is after all the social one in the family."