dedicated to sven... maybe one day she can get a fatty
Another day at school for Yosuke, being constantly bombarded with hateful comments by his peers, "Haha Yosuke's got a flatty!" "Look at that flat ass LOL!!" "He'll never have a fatty, no ass to drop!" He couldn't take it anymore, he had to make a change, and suddenly, out of the corner out of his eye, he saw the juiciest ass.
His eyes widened as he ran over to the blue-haired man, who looked him up and down as he approached, "Hey- you're Yosuke right? The one with the flat ass?" Yosuke nodded, ashamed, "I.. I was wondering if you could teach me your ways... You seem to have the fattest ass in the school, I want to know how to get one too..." Washington scoffed, "And why should I do that?" Yosuke pulled out a briefcase in which was multiple premium lemons, "These can be yours.." "OMG! Lemons!?" Washington was in disbelief, "Yes, yes, of course, I'll show you how to get the fattest ass. Meet me at the gym after school tomorrow." Yosuke closed the briefcase and put it away, smirking, "Can't wait."
AFTER SCHOOL - GYM
"Alright Yosuke, are you ready to begin?" Yosuke nodded, "As ready as I could ever be." "Perfect, so first, you got to do 500 squats, while simultaneously inserting your credit card into my card reader." "Wh- ok you know what whatever." He began the squats, and many other exercises given by Washington, and after a few hours, their training session was over. "Wow! My ass looks great, even though it's only the first day." Washington grinned, "My method is flawless, you'll have my fatty within a few days."
And so, Yosuke and Washington vigorously trained for a week, unfortunately, Yosuke wasn't really seeing a difference, "Am I being scammed?" He thought to himself, seeing as his flatty wasn't improving as well as he thought, he knew the answer was yes.. "Washington." Yosuke looked Washington in the eyes, "You're scamming me aren't you, look at my ass, LOOK AT IT. What do you see. IT'S STILL FLAT." A worried expression took over Washington's face, "Woah woah woah, I'm not scamming anyone! Maybe you're just destined to have a flatty.." This just made Yosuke even angrier, "NO. THERE'S NO WAY. YOU KNOW WHAT." Yosuke kicked Washington's ass, only to find that it's rock solid, with horrified expressions they looked each other in the eyes, "It's.. It's fake, isn't it, Washington?" "No you've got it all wrong, I swear, my ass isn't fake!" Yosuke shook his head, "Our business here is over, I'll look for an ass somewhere else, from someone with a real one." Tears welled in Washington's eyes as he watched Yosuke walk off, "Wait! Please!" But Yosuke didn't turn back...
Back at school, once again pummeled with insults, but he was used to it by now, he just needed to get the day over with. When he sat in his first hour, he looked over to the guy sitting next to him, and noticed his ass was practically spilling out of his seat, "Got a starin problem???" Yosuke averted his eyes from the ass and looked him in the eyes, "Your ass is huge!!!!! Please teach me your ways!!!!" "Aren't you Yosuke, the guy with the flat ass..?" Yosuke rolled his eyes, "Yeah, that's me, I really wanna know how to get a fatty." The guy looked him up and down, "Uh huh, I'm Kanji, and why do you even wanna get one?? Does it really matter?" "Of course it matters! How else am I supposed to impress Yu??" Kanji's eyes widened, "You mean... your gay?" He nodded, confused, Kanji started projectile vomiting as soon as those words hit his ears, "I DON'T TEACH GAY PEOPLE." The whole class was staring at them now, whispers arose, "He's gay?" "Isn't he the guy with the flat ass?" "That's so weird.."
Now angry at Kanji and the class, Yosuke got up, and pointed at Washington, "Well you know what? HIS ASS IS FAKE." A loud gasp escaped the classmates, many asking for proof, so Yosuke slapped Washington's ass, hard, but all that was heard was the sound of plastic. "BOOOO HIS ASS IS FAKE, BOOOOOOOOOOOO." Washington started bawling and ran out of the classroom. "Wow Yosuke, that was not cool." Kanji said, "Fuck you too ugly." Yosuke ripped off Kanjis wig, and the class began booing at his baldness. Kanji, now angry and sobbing, reached into his backpack and shot up the school and everyone died.
THE END
