Basketball is Not Life

Chapter Thirty-Seven

I walk down to Parker and Larry's room while my mother is getting ready. Larry opens the door. His eyes let me know that something is not right. I walk into the room and find Parker on the edge of his bed, his hands in his lap; he's cradling the one. His head snaps up when I say his name.

"Parker... What did you do?" My words are shaky, but I knew what he had done; his shooting hand looked to be swelling up.

"What I should have done sooner."

I let out a laugh. "So you what found him and hit him?"

He winces when he stands up. "I may have done a little more than that."

"Why?"

"Because Ren, he deserved it. He deserves a lot more than what I gave him last night. He needs to know that what he did to you was not ok. He needs to know that if he ever touches you again, that I'll kill him." He was shaking, his anger coming back to him.

"Right, Parker. Teaching him a lesson." I push my pointer finger into him. "You did this for you because you don't know how to contain your anger."

"No Ren. I can contain my anger; I chose not to."

"You beating him up is not going to do anything, Parker." I throw my hands up. "What you gave him last night, I can tell you, was nothing." Parker huffs as if I was wrong. I keep going. "What you gave him last night was just a warm-up of all the other nights his dad used to abuse him. I can tell you what you did isn't going to stop him from changing. You can't change a monster."

"I'm sorry," Parker says when I turn to go back to find my mother. "I'm sorry. I just felt useless; I felt like I had to do something... To f..."

"To fix it?" I turned back to him. "There is no fixing it; it's done. No one can go back in time and tell me to stop being stupid. I had so many chances to speak up, Parker." I am shouting. "I didn't speak up. I am the reason why that night happened. No one else. Me." His face shoots up in surprise. "Is that what you think? That it's your fault?"

"It is," I say, my voice going back to normal.

"Bullshit Ren" his hands are through his hair and then back to his side. "It's that fucker's fault. No one else's."

There is a knock at the door, and everything goes silent. Larry is still in the room, I had forgotten he was there, and now he knows there is so much more to my story that he doesn't know. He steps around the bed and walks to open the door. To our surprise, there stands my dad and Coach Rizzo. This was not good.

"Larry, how about you head out, son." Coach Rizzo says.

"Ren?" My father says my name looking at Parker and me, Parker was cradling his hand in front of him, and now both hands were behind his back; he was trying to look casual.

"Dad," I say back, not knowing what else to say.

I stepped toward Parker; I was not leaving him.

"I suppose you can stay, Renee," Coach R says, and I can tell he is not happy, not one bit.

My dad is the first to talk. "Ryan Hayes got jumped outside of the hotel last night. He is claiming he does not know who jumped him." My dad looks over at Parker at this point.

"Ok," Is all Parker says. And right now, I'm scared Parker will not be able to play in the tournament because of me.

"Parker, was it you?" Coach R asks.

"And if it was?" Parker says, not admitting to it.

"I would assume we would have to have you sit out and talk to the NCAA about.."

"It's my fault." I cut Coach off.

"You beat him up?" My dad says in his "ok Ren let's not be dumb here" tone.

"No, but what happened to me led Parker to react."

"What happened to you?" My dad asks.

I shake my head. I can't do this. I turn into Parker; he takes his hands out from behind his back and grabs me around him. They give me a few seconds, and then I turn around to look at my dad.

"He Ra.. He raped me...."

It was the third time I had to say that sentence, and it never became easier. My father's face goes blank, and then it is replaced with rage.

"When?" I had never seen my father this mad.

"Senior year, after Duke lost to Michigan State." Parker tenses, one of the best nights of his life, was the worst of mine.

"Regardless..." Coach starts to talk.

"Regardless what?" My dad seethes. "There is no proof that Parker was the one who did it."

"Look at his hands."

"Are you saying you want your star player sitting out for the rest of the tournament?" My dad asks him. "Ryan is not going to come out and say who did it. Which is obvious now why he won't."

And Coach Rizzo squares up. "Are you saying you want the same rematch as last year? You will not win."

My dad shrugs. "I want to only play and beat the best. Now, if you could leave, I have some things I need to talk to my daughter about."

Coach R turns to Parker. "Go see the trainer about your hand asap. You'll be lucky to play if it swells anymore." He turns to me. "I'm sorry, Renee."

Parker grits out. "I'll be fine. I'll head down in a bit."

My dad waits until the door is closed.

"Are you ok?" My dad asks me. Sitting down on the bed across from me.

"I will be... Eventually." I can see the concern in his eyes. "Parker found a counselor nearby where we live, and he has been taking me." I knew that when we got back, Doc and I had a lot to talk about. If I could tell my parents, I should be able to tell her now.

My dad looks over to Parker. "Thank you."

Parker shrugs.

My dad pulls me into his arms. "I'm so sorry, Renee" I knew it was severe. He always called me Ren.

"It's ok, dad." I pat his hand when he is done hugging me.

"If you need anything, call me. And I think it would be good if your mom and I came back to Michigan State with you after the season is done ."

I roll my eyes at him. "Only for a couple days." I smile at him.

"A couple of days then, just you, your mom, and I."

Parker clears his throat. "And me."

"I just assumed that was a given." My dad chuckles, turning toward the door. He turns back to Parker and me. "I hope you got him good, son."

"As best as I could, sir." My father nods his head and walks out the door.

I stand up to go back to my room and to find mom. She would need to know that dad now knows. I had her promise me she would not tell him until after the tournament.

"Are we ok?" Parker asks me.

I nod. "Go get your hand looked at."

"Ren, I'm sorry."

I walk back over to him. "It's ok. I can only imagine what I would do if someone hurt you." He kisses my lips.

"PT now," I say sternly. I wait until he walks out and the door closes. I know what I have to do after the tournament; I have to move out when we get home.