Falling for Death

Secrets

Harper

TW; this chapter contains mild mentions of suicide!!

We passed through the empty streets and my arms were tightly wrapped around him. I was probably suffocating him but oh well. I felt the wind make my hair fly around everywhere.

It felt nice.

Ace sped up a little and I realized that we were headed in the direction towards the beach.

And at the beach there was a cliff that overlooked the ocean. The scenery was very pretty. I always loved going there, it helps me clear my mind. I guess so does he.

It takes about a half our to get there so I savoured this moment with him and snuggled my face deeper into his back whilst peeking a little as we passed through the city. I admired how the stars are getting more and more visible the further we got away from the city.

He pulled up to a very familiar clearing and there was the path that led up to the cliff. Placing his hands on my waist, he helped me off and I immediately took off the helmet and my hair flew around with the wind. I laughed and moved a strand of hair away from my face.

He licked his lips and nodded towards the path. We walked up to the top, in comfortable silence and I was yet again amazed by the amazing view.

I walked over closer to the edge and sat down on the cold ground. Ace sat beside me and lit up a cigarette as usual.

I wonder if he does that because he too doesn't want to live in this cruel world any longer or if it's just an addiction he can't get rid of or both.

I sighed and looked down at the sea down below and when I do, two things popped into my mind, I kind of wanted to jump and if I did, nothing could stop me.

Think about it, theoretically, I could just jump, Like I could and nothing is exactly stopping me from doing so. Or more like nothing physical is. If I jumped, I would just land in the ocean  and drown.

Nothing is actually stopping me, well other than the fact that I'll leave behind everything and probably make people sad but it would put an end to my misery.

But at what cost?

You know, another thing I really hate about society is that when someone wants to end their life, the first thought is always 'wow that's selfish. How could you just want leave and make everybody feel bad?' well I think that's fucking ridiculous.

What about the person's feelings? What about the fact that they are suffering? Do people really think that suicide is an easy choice? How the fuck is it selfish?

Putting your feelings before someone else's is definitely not fucking selfish.

The sound of waves crashing against the shore snapped me out of my thoughts. I sighed and looked away from it and back at Ace, who was again, already staring at me.

"What's on your mind?" he said, as he breathed out, letting the smoke fill the air around us.

A lot is on my mind, Ace. Even you.

"Why do you smoke?" I asked, ignoring his question, tilting my head slightly to the side, he shrugged nonchalantly in response.

"Why do you care?" he said taking in another drag.

"Because I care about you." I told him honestly.

"Why?" he said again.

"I don't know. I tend to care about a lot of things and you're one of them." I said.