Lies Behind Truth

Sorry

Grey's POV

Napatayo ako at madaling nilapitan ang babae saka hinila ang braso nito, napalingon naman ang babae and her hazelnut eyes meets mine.

"Clara!ikaw nga" Mabilis ko itong niyapos ng mahigpit na yakap sabay halik sa ulo nito.

Hindi naman ito gumalaw sa kanyang kinatatayuan. Hinawakan ko ang mga balikat nito at bahagya siyang niyugyog to see her reaction, but she didn't react. She's emotionless.

"Hon?" Mataman ko siyang tinignan. But still no response from her, i have no doubts na si Clara itong kaharap ko.

"Honey!?please, talk to me." Pagmamakaawa ko rito. Ngunit hindi pa rin ito umimik, kapagkuwa'y tinanggal nito ang kamay ko at taas-kilay akong tiningnan.

"Anong kailangan mo sa'kin?" Tanong nito. 'expressionless.'

"Honey please can we talk?even a couple of minutes please." Pagmamakaawa ko rito. She just sighed and looked at me emotionless.

"Okay! Sa labas tayo, magpapaalam na muna ako sa mga kasama ko." Anito.

Tumango naman ako, habang siya naman ay tinungo ang mga kasama niya at kinausap ang mga ito, saka sumenyas sa'kin na lumabas.
Pagkalabas naming dalawa. I'm tongue tied, I don't know where to start and I can't even focus.

"Ano ba Grey!?sinasayang mo ang oras ko!" Pukaw nito sa'kin.

I can feel her irritation now, kahit distansya ang pagitan naming dalawa. It's a strange thing to me! After all that we've been through, were more like strangers now.

"Im so sorry hon---"

"Clara! Clara Samonte." Pagputol nito sa sasabihin ko.

"But--"

"Grey! please tigilan na natin 'to? Tama na yung two and a half year mo akong pinahirapan, okay? Sapat nang hiniwalayan mo ako. Im trying to moved on with my life now," Marahan nitong turan habang walang kaemosyon-emosyon akonv tinignan.

"Im so sorry Clara, alam ko nasaktan kita nang husto, that's why im here! Im sincerely apologizing for all the things that i have done to you! For all the sorrows and pain that I've caused you! Im really sorry!." Im begging for her forgiveness and trying to make up things with her.

"Grey! Ang daling tanggapin ng sorry mo pero yung mga sakit at pighati na dinulot mo sa'kin. Ang laking pilat na naiwan 'nun dito sa puso ko! And you know what? ang hirap-hirap na para sa'kin ang magtiwala sa kahit na kanino at alam mo ba kung bakit? dahil nadurog mo nang husto ang pagtitiwala at pagmamahal ko sayo! Hirap na hirap na akong mabuo at ibalik ang lahat ng yun!"

I know she's trying to hide those tears in her eyes, alam kong gusto nitong magwala at pasakitan ako dahil sa mga nagawa ko rito. But she able to managed her anger, she really know how to hide her emotions. Siya yung babaeng kahit nahihirapan at pagod na lalaban pa rin at itatago ang totoong nararamdaman. To let other people see that she's brave enough and strong.

"Clara im so sorry! so,so,so sorry! Im sorry for hurting you so much! Sorry for breaking your trust! Sorry for causing you many troubles into your life! Sorry for not loving you back the way that you loved me! Sorry for all my lies and denial things that I've made through! And Im so sorry for letting you go that way, sorry for not choosing you over Valerie! Im so sorry for all the horrible things that I've caused you hon."

Puno ng pagsusumamo kong turan sa kanya. I know this is not enough! But this is the right thing to do. Dahil wala naman talagang kasalanan si Clara sa lahat ng ito, and the best way to have her forgiveness is to apologize on her wholeheartedly. Pansamantala ito lang muna ang magagawa ko, i need to earn her trust first before going back to what we have started before.

"Salamat sa mga sorry mo Grey! pero hindi yun sapat, at kahit anong gawin mong paghingi ng sorry wala nang maibabalik sa ating dalawa! tandaan mo yan Grey. I maybe can forgive you but the trust and love that i had with you before! Is all gone!"

I looked straight into her eyes and all i can see is a cold hearted woman infront of me. I couldn't even see the old Clara on her, she's no longer the Clara that I've longing for, she's no Clara that i wanted to get back in my life. 'how this could be?'

"Wala akong magagawa kung hindi mo na ako kayang patawarin hon, I understand you. But im trying my best to make it up to you! Hindi ko hinihingi na mahalin mo ako ulit,ang akin lang---"

"I want to make it clear to you Grey, sinabi kong mapapatawad kita pero hindi yun agad-agad, at ang tiwala saka pagmamahal tuluyan nang naglaho yun Grey, im telling you this para hindi ka umasa na patay na patay pa ako sa'yo, at diba kinasal kana?so why bothering me!?"

May bakas na nang pagtataray nitong turan. 'nagbago na nga marahil siya! Hindi na siya ang Clara na mahinhin at malumanay, sweet and clingy, ibang-iba na nga siya.' Malalim na paghinga ang binuga ko saka ito hinarap without any emotions too.

"Fine! I will not pestering you anymore,and thanks for hearing me out!" Puno ng pagkadismaya kong turan sa kanya saka ito tinalikuran at bumalik sa loob ng club, naiwan naman ito doon na nakatayo at hindi nagsasalita.

I don't care anyway, as if she wanted me to care with her. Sa ganun kaikling panahon nagbago na agad ang pakikitungo nito sa'kin. She's now cold like ice, expressionless, emotionless, lahat na nga siguro ng less nasa kanya na! F*cked! Para akong sinasaksak ng paulit-ulit, bakit ganito ang nadarama ko?bakit sobrang apektado ako sa pagkikita at pag-uusap naming ito ngayon? dahil lang ba 'to sa kalasingan ko o dahil sa may totoo na talaga akong nararamdaman kay Clara, but im just being denial for so long! F*cked!

Bumalik ako sa mesa namin at tahimik na tinungab ang alak, I want to get really drunked right now! Alam kong nakamasid ang mga kaibigan ko sa'kin at nabigla sa mga naging pangyayari kanina.

"So that woman is your lover?" Paul asked in confusion.

"YES!" Matiim bagang kong sagot.

"She's sexy dude!" Ani ni Paul.

"Shut the f*cked up Paul!" Inis kong papatahimik rito, but he just smirked,

"Don't you dare put a finger on her! She's mine." Possessiveness filled me.

"F*ck men! So possessive of you! dude may i remind you that you are a married man now and you broken-up with her, so' I think she's not yours anymore" Nakangising panunudyo sa'kin ni Paul. Kahit kailan talaga ang bunganga nito sarap busalan.

"F*ck you Paul! gusto mo bang patayin kita dito ngayon mismo?" Walang bahid ng pagbibiro kong turan sa kanya.

"Damn man! Chill okay!" Sabay ngisi nito.

Alam ko naman nagbibiro lang ito, pero naiirita ako sa tuwing may nagkaka-interes ky Clara. Alam ko naman na hindi ko na siya pag-aari ngayon. But she's the only woman that loves me the most and i hate it when someone trying to caught her attention, ayokong makita siyang nilalandi ng iba lalo pa at wala nang kami.

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Can you share some ideas to me? To fulfill my story 👌