Unexpected problem (Killugon)

Scared And Hurt

TW! self harm
(2 months along)
(GONS POV)

I heard the apartment door open and I jumped. I quickly pecked out of the bedroom and saw killua put the keys on the key rack. I started to hyperventilate and get really scared I didn't want him to yell at me again. I ran into the bathroom in our bedroom and locked the door 'I don't wanna be here anymore, I gotta go! No one will mind they'll be ok!' I thought,

I looking through the draws for a razor. I found one quickly and broke the blade out of the base of the razor. I heard a knock at the door before I could press it to my skin "hey Gon? Can you open the door? I need to talk to you?" I didn't say anything. I continued to breathe really heavily and lifted the blade to my chest looking in the mirror.

I gently press down and felt it break my skin. "GON! Hey, what are you doing opening the door!" He said now banging on it trying to break thought and I made a slit on my chest. I let out a small whimper.

"Gon! Hey Hey Hey Gon! SWEETHEART! OPEN THE DOOR!!! it's ok please just open the door! Please! I love you! I love you so much and I'm so so so so sorry! I'm sorry just please don't do this! COME ON PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR" He yelled. I let a little line of blood run down my chest it tickled and went down to my growing belly, the cut was not deep but it was kinda long.

"Gon I swear to god I'm going to break down this door OPEN IT!" I stayed put going to make another couple cuts until he was able to break it open. He saw me and froze. "Put it down," he said I shook my head, "just stay back," I said putting it to my throat. "Baby please put it down, listen, Hey! Listen to me. I'm not mad, let's talk about this, just toss it aside, it's ok." He said as slowly inches closer.

"Just please stay back," I said "baby please, hey hey look at me," I couldn't "Come on look at me." I shook my head "love, look at me, if your going to kill yourself I want you to look me in the eye and slice your throat I will not move just look at me." I looked at him and my heart stopped. Tears were streaming down my face, I froze.

He took the chase and quickly grabbed the blade out of my hand, tossing it somewhere random into the bathroom.

"Hey it's ok I got you! Your ok don't worry I got you I love you! Hey when your ready can you take a deep breath for me, love, just a big deep breath!" Killua said sobbing and grabbing a wet washcloth putting it under some hot water and then pressing it to my chest he then pulled my body into his arms and I cried into his chest trying to gently wipe the blood away with our causing minimal pain,.

"it's ok, I'm so sorry I shouldn't have said those things none of them were true I love you so much your not discussing and I am so proud of you for carrying this baby even though there is so much more stressful things going on!" he said

I slowly fell limp in his arms and let him do whatever he wanted to me. He grabs some hydrogen peroxide and bandages he put my body against the wall a kneel down next to me. "Hey beautiful, this is going to sting a little but don't worry it's going to help with the cuts. Can I take off your shirt all the way?" I nodded 

he pulled it off glancing at my stomach and smiling. He poured the liquid onto a cotton ball then then took the towel off my chest and paced the cotton ball on the cut. I let out a small whimper and squeezed his other hand as he continued to run the cotton up and down the cut. Then he took the roll of bandages and tore off the roll and gently placed it against my chest and he did one more just to make sure it did not fall off.

"Ok there, don't touch that unless your changing it, Ok?" He said then he leaned down and pressed his lips against my tummy and rubbed the sides pulling away "does you stomach hurt?" "It's a little bit achy but besides that it's ok, sometimes I get really bad cramps."
then he grabbed my chin and lifted it so he could look in my eyes. "You have some of the most beautiful eyes I'm so lucky I get to look in them all time," He said I started to let out a few tears he wiped them and place his lips gently on mine. "Thank you lovley"

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean anything of what I said. "I know it's not your fault you were probably so scared when you found out. I'm sorry I was such a jerk about it!" He said and he lightly rubbed my belly "I love you so much and I am amazed at how strong you are for doing this! It's so amazing especially since you are only 17! You are taking all the pains and I could not be prouder of you!"

Like you probably sick of throwing up and all of these pains all over your body and I just want you to feel better so if there is nothing I can do please tell me, because I was to help you thought this and I am sorry sorry for how I treated you! I'm actually really excited and I can't wait to have a child with you, And even tho we are young and still in high school it's ok, I'm always gone be here to support you from now on. I guess I was just mad you did not tell me but I get it and I was such a jerk I probably said the things that you didn't want me to say when you were gonna tell me! I love you so much and everything

I said before just ignore it! Of course you can go to school and graduate and I'll be there to help you!" Killua said I nodded and killua picked me up and brought me to the bed and cuddled me. One of this hands was in my hair the other on my back. "Hey you said that you get really bad back pains right? Where?" " They mainly on my lower back" killua moved his hand down to my lower back and started to put a little pressure and rub my back. It felt so much better killua's hands had to be magic or something!

"Hey Gon?" "Yeah?" I said in a sleepy tone "Do you think we should tell aunt Mito or my mom? I'm sure that since they are both women and strong they might be able to help you through it a little bit, but only if your comfortable!" I nodded "I know that your mom is really nice as aunt mito would be understanding" (killua's mom is really nice and chill in this story) "ok well I'll text my mom later and ask her when we can meet up to talk and you don't he se for your aunt mito, remember even if they don't support you and they get really mad that's the worse they could do and that I still love you and will be here!" Killua said "I nodded

I nuzzled my face in his chest. "You wanna get some sleep love?" "Mhmm" I let out a small giggle and so did Killua "ok well you go ahead! But tomorrow we gotta go to school ok? im sorry for say you could not go to school to that was not fair either!" I nodded again and slowly drifted to sleep. "Oh hey Killua?" "Yes" "if I get morning sickness you don't need to help me if you don't feel like it I'll try not to wake you up," I said "oh Gon I want you to wake me up so that I can help you feel better! Please don't be scared to wake me up,"