At Her Best.

Thirty.

In life, the plan is always to move up, move on, and move forward. And after weeks of self-introspection and putting in the work to reidentify who La'Raja Harper is, I can finally say that I've conquered all three of those sentiments. The past few months have certainly been an eye opener, it's an experience I'll never forget. There were times where I thought I'd never overcome specific obstacles, there were times where I thought things had come to an end for me. I'd given up more than a few times along the way, I knew there were consequences to every action. I knew I wasn't living right, wasn't doing right. Therefore, I was willing to lie down and take my defeat. However, La'Raja's voyage wasn't over. She still had more ways to go. Life had other plans for me, and I'm glad I came out on the other side.

Mason's harsh grunts snapped me out of my thoughts and back into reality. Today I was moving into my new apartment, and Mason, Ravi and Keisha were helping me move in. I gazed around the new space with satisfaction. I completely adored my new surroundings. It wasn't as luxurious as my previous place, but it suited me just fine. This new place felt more intimate, more my style. I felt like I was putting on a big front with my other place, for I had an excessive amount of glamourous shit for no reason. But I was living in my truth now, and it felt damn good.

I smiled at my friends who were all doing their part to ensure my move was smooth sailing. Jamal was busy lifting boxes from one place to the next, Keisha was deep cleaning surfaces, and Ravi was having a talk with the building manager to make sure all the official business was intact. I truly had good, wholesome people around me. This is the company I should have been keeping. Keisha and I were drawing even closer than before. Our weekly therapy trips to the prison and lunch dates were bonding us tighter. It reminded me of college days. I told my longest college friend about Mama Sal's and Ruth's cases, and she's been eager to reopen their cases and try her hand at their defense. Keisha and I have been speaking to Mama Sal and Ruth a whole lot more lately, and it's safe to say that we've created one beautiful sisterhood.

My mom was coming over later to cook dinner and catch up. We spoke briefly on the phone about my run in with her son, and she went on and on about how proud she was of me. She loved how I handled that situation. And I never thought I'd say this, but hearing her praises made me feel all good inside. I'm forever glad that we rekindled our relationship, having my mom back in my life was a necessity. Life was way too short to act like I didn't love or care for that lady, and I'm happy we mended fences before it was too late.  

My friends took over all there was to do, so I popped open a bottle of white wine and headed to the balcony. Overlooking a visually pleasing sunset, I sipped slowly on the beverage and sighed with relief. I was so damn happy to be in the position I was in. There weren't enough words to describe how elated I was feeling. It felt like a fresh start. I've officially shed the old Raja, I didn't even know who the hell that was anymore. Between classes, I would see some girls eyeing me. Some of them even had the courage to approach me to pry, trying to gather tips about the very dangerous, provocative life I once lived. They were all deeply disappointed when they realized I was no longer an advocate for that fast living and looked at me like I was downright tripping. I know I probably seemed boring to them, but I really really liked boring. I was now in love with the idea of stability and some form of structure. I don't care how dull that sounds. Nevertheless, I'll never tell the next woman what to do with her life. Shit, I was all for the girls getting their coin and securing their bags. Hell, some women can successfully handle that fast lifestyle and reap all the benefits that come with it. But there's always a chance of things going wrong for you, and those repercussions aren't always the easiest to swallow.

I was wrapping up my second glass of wine when Jamal came to check on me. Apparently today was Astra's funeral and he wanted to know how I was holding up. I've been hearing a lot of buzz about the service, but like the Lorenzo situation, I also put that to bed. I wasn't always the greatest friend to Ms. Clark, that I must attest to. It was easier for me to get over her betrayal knowing the role I played in our 'friendship'. My motives were oftentimes shady and fucked up. I had to hold myself accountable for my wrongdoings. It's unfortunate how things turned out with us, and that too was an important learning lesson for me.

Jamal and I stood on my balcony in comfortable silence and smiled at each other every once in a while when our eyes linked. I really liked how close Mason and I were becoming, he was more than the flirty play toy I once saw him as. I was planning on being single for as long as possible, focusing and learning myself was top priority. I wanted to get to know me all over again, so much has changed within me. I had to find out more things that I liked, I wanted to date myself for this time being. However, I could definitely see Mason and I becoming more in the future. Give it some time, and we'll be loving on each other and sexing on every piece of furniture we own.

All in all, I felt free and renewed. This was my time to shine, and I was gonna live life to the absolute fullest. I had an extremely optimistic outlook on my new quiet life. I was going to be the best version of myself. I had so much to offer, and I planned on using my talents and voice in the most positive light possible. Second chances are indeed attainable, and with this fresh opportunity, I was going to reach astounding heights. I was going to use my youth to my full advantage, grinding and making a name for myself was key. Pouring myself another glass of wine, I took a moment to evaluate my life from the top of the year until now. So much has changed over a period of time, it was actually fascinating. I've calmed and settled down a whole lot, but please don't ever get it twisted. La'Raja Ajade Harper was and will always be...that bitch.

                                 End.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Hey Loves,

Thank you for taking the time out to read my book, 'At Her Best'. I'm so appreciative that you chose this book, I hope La'Raja's story was enjoyable & entertaining. Continue to stay safe and positive out there, and never stop chasing your dreams! Wishing you all peace, love, happiness, and prosperity in all your endeavors. Sending great vibes and energy your way.

Best Regards,

AshMicaela