Yiikmas for the Dumbasses Who Inhabit the Yiik World

Chapter 1: Basically the Weirdly Paced Introduction Chapter

It was the day before Chitmas Eve, and Alex heard a knock on the door while he and his mother set up Chitmas decorations throughout the house. The Egberts were hosting a small Chitmas party for Alex's friend group. "Is that one of your friends, sweetie?" Alex's mom inquired.

"It probably is. Don't worry Mom, I've got it!" Alex yelled. He set the abnormally heavy Hello Kitty Chitmas ornaments that he was carrying on the table and went to the door.

He opened it to see Claudio and Chondra Whatever Their Last Names Are. Claudio started off the conversation by being as friendly as possible. "Hey hey Alex! How are you doing?"

"Alex!" Chondra greeted him with less enthusiasm.

Alex didn't say a word. He was too busy monologuing to himself about Claudio and Chondra's character traits.

"Alex." Chondra became frustrated by Alex's monologuing already. She clapped in front of his face, still getting no responses. "Claudio can you help me-" Claudio interrupted her with a little squeal. He noticed the Hello Kitty ornaments and let himself into the house in order to look at them closely.

Chondra groaned and let herself into the house as well.  She slammed the door in a last ditch effort to get Alex's attention, but only alerted Alex's mom.

Alex's mom walked out of the kitchen where she was making popcorn. Instead of greeting the Whatever Their Last Names Are, she put Santa hats on their heads and walked back into the kitchen. Chondra looked at Alex's mom with confusion, but decided to simply take a power nap on the living room couch. Claudio payed them no mind and continued to analyze the Hello Kitty ornaments.

Alex popped out of his daze just in time for the next set of knocks on the door. "It's not locked." Alex said.

Vella and Rory entered the house each carrying a plate covered in tin foil. "What's up Alex? Where do you want us to put these?" Vella asked him.

Alex stared at the plates. "What are those? They smell so good."

"They're cookies." Rory stated.

Alex went to lift the tinfoil, but his hand was slapped away by Vella. "Alex, no. They're for Santa Claus, not for the manchildren that he gives the presents to." Vella was dead set on insulting Alex as much as possible.

Rory likes Santa. "Yay Santa." He smiled for the first time in years because he was thinking about Santa instead of his dead sister.

"Haha Vella, very funny." Alex was a little hurt by Vella's comment. "You guys can put those on the kitchen counter if it isn't covered in popcorn."

Vella and Rory went to put the cookies in the kitchen and came back wearing Santa hats. Vella looked like she was about to ask a question, but just shrugged it off and cuddled Chondra on the couch. Rory took the opportunity to stand on the stairs, watching the pathetic ants go about their meaningless lives.

Alex continued to be a good son by helping set up Chitmas decorations. He had a battle with Claudio about reclaiming the abnormally heavy Hello Kitty Chitmas ornaments, but they compromised by having Claudio keep one of the ornaments. Alex continued to set up decorations until he heard another knock on the door.