Foreign Lands (BC X HxH)

40 Forgiveness

Killua woke up with a groan, then grumbled and rolled over. Why's it so loud? There was crashing and thumping from downstairs, he was still trying to sleep. Wait a minute- Killua shot upright in his bed, then he put a hand to his chest. I'm...free. I'm free of the curse, it's morning. He gritted his teeth. We're back at the bulls hideout, but I don't remember anything. The last thing he remembered was falling asleep next to Gon. He didn't like that, not at all. Why couldn't he remember? He got out of bed and was about to apply some concealer when he saw that his eyebags were gone as well as the red marks from crying. Actually, his face looked flawless. Am I already wearing some? He thought in confusion, but when he rubbed at his face nothing came off. Killua shrugged, then applied his eyeliner and a small bit of faint blue eyeshadow because he felt like it.

There was some fluttering, but when he looked up Nero wasn't there. "Damn bird, if your gonna fly by me at least come say hi" he grumbled, then he noticed something. He wasn't wearing the same clothes that he fell asleep in. Killua flushed, letting out a yelp. D-Did Gon fucking change me? While I was asleep? Well- if it was between him and one of the other squad members....uuugggghhhhh. He put his face in his hands, "Damn ittt" Then he sighed. "Now, why the hell are those idiots making all that noise" He muttered, then started his way down the stairs. The noises were getting clearer and clearer, he heard thumping and growling and shouting. "Stay still!", "Damn it why're they so fast?", "Catch them!", "Get away from my yummies!", "Gon do something!", "I-I can't! I don't know why they won't listen to me!" He let out a deep sigh. The beasts got out didn't they.

Killua stopped at the top of the stairs, then let out a sharp whistle. Everybody froze, including the beasts. "Ruuu!" Lupe pounded up the stairs and nearly bowled him over as he licked his face, Ursa and Simia were not far behind. He chuckled, stroking each of them in turn. "Miss me guys?" Ursa butted her head into his shoulder and he heard a growl. "Why didn't they listen to me!" Gon shouted. He smirked down the stairs at him, then snapped his fingers. All 3 beasts sat and he put his hands behind his head. "I'm the alpha bitch, your nothing more than a playmate they tolerate because the alpha would be pissed if you were harmed" Gon let out an offended huff. "Is that really all I am to you guys? Damn it I thought you loved me" Gon said dramatically as he stroked Ursa. She let out a rumble and butted his hand, to which he rolled his eyes. "They do like me. ha" Then he sighed. "But I know the real reason I couldn't control them" He blinked over at Gon, who had turned kind of serious.

"You've been sleeping for 3 days" A bolt of shock ran through him. "I...did? I haven't woken up since I fell asleep after the curse magic was lifted?" Gon froze. "No...you did wake up after that. Do you...not remember?" He shook his head. "I remember falling asleep in the bed, and then waking up at the hideout." Gon looked thoughtful for a moment. "Well...maybe I shouldn't tell him" He muttered that last part under his breath. Killua's eyes narrowed. "Shouldn't tell me what?" He winced slightly. "You know what, let's get these guys back to the cage before we go over events" I don't like that, why doesn't he want to tell me? He helped Gon return Lupe and the others to their cage, then walked back to the main room. He noticed how most of the bulls shot him unreadable looks, he shifted a little under the scrutiny. They sat down on Vanessa's couch and Gon took his hand. "I want you to hear the whole thing before you say a word alright?"

Killua gritted his teeth. "I'm already not liking this, I don't like the look on your face. You tell me everything so why...why did you try to hide it?" He looked down. "The witch queen...said We had no mana." He stiffened slightly. We don't, but how'd she figure that out? "She wanted...to find out why so...while you were sleeping..." Killua's misgivings grew. "She used her blood magic and put you under her control" Fear shot through him. "She WH-" Gon silenced him. "I said wait until I finish" He gritted his teeth, then Gon continued. "She had all of us trapped, she had you under her control, I knew I needed to free you so...I woke you up." He growled a little. Woke me up, so he freed me? "She said it was impossible, but I knew a way. I screamed, I knew that if I screamed like I was terrified for my life you'd wake up and snap out of it" A tear rolled down Gon's cheek, he really wasn't liking this.

"Y-You...were aware for a moment. A single moment before you were put back under the control" Gon's hand clenched on his a little. Did I hurt anyone? "I knew you were aware, sure you couldn't see but you could hear us at least because when I yelled out your name you stopped a few meters away" Gon looked away. "A-And...you drove your own hand into your chest" He said faintly. Killua pulled Gon closer onto his lap, then let him cry into his shoulder. "I-I was so mad. So mad and scared." I feel like...it was the right thing though. If it was between that and becoming someone's toy again... "And the witch queen didn't look sorry at all, she kept saying how you overreacted and it was your own fault for moving" Killua let out a sigh. "If it was between being used for genocide and stabbing myself in the chest, you know what my answer would be"

Gon's hands gripped his shoulder hard and he looked up with a grit of his teeth and fierceness in his eyes. "I told you, never do anything like that! You're not a-allowed to kill y-yourself" His voice shook on the last bit, and he bit his lip. "I don't remember what thoughts I was having back then, but I do know one thing" He said. "Killing you, would be the ultimate for of betrayal. And if it ever happened, I wouldn't hesitate." Gon's grip loosened and he slid his arms around Killua's back, crying into his chest now. Killua couldn't help but blush a little, but Gon needed this so he would let him cry. "it was just like with the spikes" Vanessa murmured from a few feet away, he hadn't noticed her until that moment. "You put those kids before yourself, allowed your body to experience the pain so they didn't have to. You are a true magic knight"

Killua's eyes darkened. "I'm not, I probably never will be." Gon smacked him and he blinked down at him in confusion and slight irritation. "The next time you talk that way I'll do it harder" he growled. Killua snorted. "You know why I never will" Vanessa spoke. "Just because you were manipulated into killing people doesn't mean you're a bad person" Killua froze. How the- "Why the hell do you know that? Gon what the fuck did you tell them?" he raised his voice a little. I was just getting used to being around people who didn't fear me, why? "I got really mad and may have yelled that you were pretty much controlled into killing people and that's why you hurt yourself" He said, sitting up and wiping his eyes. Killua gritted his teeth. "wow. Thanks. I was finally getting used to being treated like an actual person. Now we're probably going to have to fucking leave because of your bad habit of spilling information!"

Vanessa blinked. "Who says you have to leave?" Killua scowled. "I'm a cold blooded murderer" Gon frowned slightly. "We talked about this Killua. An assassin and a murderer are two different things" He rolled his eyes. "I still killed people! Why the hell's it matter?" no point in hiding it anymore, if they were going to hate him anyways might as well go all out. "Anyone can atone for their mistakes" Asta said, coming up behind Vanessa. He huffed. "You don't have to pretend to like me, I don't give a shit." Gon ruffled his hair and he blushed a little. "There not pretending!" He didn't really believe Gon. "You're the only person in the entire damn world that would ever accept someone like me, and that's only because you got a few screws loose" he didn't expect people to like him, or be friendly, or still want to be around him. He didn't need it.

"We've already seen your scars, what hell your training put you through." Vanessa said, in a serious tone for once. "Nobody can take that level of abuse and stay completely sane and righteous." He blinked. Asta nodded. "yeah! If you regret what you did then that means you're not a bad person for doing it. All you have to do is fix it as best as you can and don't let it hold you back!" His hand tightened a little on Gon's leg. They...aren't lying. Killua knew what a lie sounded like, they weren't. they actually...think of me as a person. Charmy climbed onto the couch and raised her arms in the air with a smile. "I'll still make you food la!" Noelle walked over and looked away. "I guess...you're not all bad." she muttered. Killua felt a tear roll down his cheek. All these people who I've only known for less than a month...they accept me. They don't think I'm a monster, or a cold hearted killer, or a weapon. They... Gon smiled. "Guess I'm not the only one with a few screws loose"

1676 words

To be continued...