female idol ᵏⁿʲ

blue & grey

his eyes spill truth
his lips speak wisdom
his skin radiates warmth
his ears listen intentively.

"i came here because apparently the company thinks my needs aren't fulfilled," he cocks one eyebrow contemptuously, "and i wanted to keep you away from men who's needs are actually unfulfilled. there is a lot of trash among men."

he doesn't have to explain further
and i don't let my thoughts run deeper as well.

i examine him intentively and search for anything off
but i can't find anything, because there is
none
just dimples and eyes and blonde, almost white strands of hair framing his face
and the everlasting warmth

"guess you're not trash then?"

again a chuckle
deep and golden
running down my throat like honey,
oh so sweet

"i hope not"

"you know, i know about expensive girl," i fixate him knowingly.

instant regret rushes in hues of red across his cheeks, the corners of his mouth twitch.
he's embarrassed

"that's, i-"

he searches for words, incredibly flustered and i realize that
kim namjoon
is flustered
because of
me

it's quite odd, this situation
considering that just minutes ago i was led to him like a lamb to the slaughter

but namjoon has collected his words again

"i- i was young and dumb, insecure too. it's really inappropriate, i know. but i promise it was all bark no bite."

and a murmured confession:
"i couldn't even look a girl in the eyes back then."

and he looks so sincere, embarrassed still, but also oh so kind
and i smile
and an almost inaudible laugh escapes my mouth
but i laugh

for the first time today