There's always room for another

Chapter 1: The fall

Straight up: not an expert on amnesia, brain trauma, medical advice or dealing with grief. This idea popped into my head and I wanted to explore it: what sort of challenges does an amnesiac who was an idol face reintegrating back into her old life? It's really a what-if journey, so no pressure if you don't think it's realistic and want to stop.

Also, TRIGGER WARNING: the premise of the whole thing is based on a suicide (not from the girls, but). If that's something you're not okay with, feel free to skip this chapter. I didn't linger on it, nor did I make it too graphic (at least, I think so). I'll provide a summary of this chapter at the beginning of the next.

Unbeta-ed and roughly edited. Feedback appreciated, especially if there's something you think I've stepped over the line about.

-----------------------------------------------

It all happened so fast.

That was the only thing Yongsun could tell the police officers later. That it had all happened so fast, no one could have done anything. Least of all her.

"Yongsun." Jeongeun-unnie called for her softly, sounding cautious. Wheein's hand in hers, Yongsun gripped it tight as she looked up from the spot at the floor she'd been staring at for the past... god, who knew how long?

Their manager looked like she'd been to hell and back. Yongsun guessed that was how they all looked like, to some extent. She certainly didn't feel like roses. They'd been on their way back to their apartments. Yongsun had been looking forward to a shower. Byulyi hadn't been able to resist commenting on her scent jokingly as they'd climbed into their van. "Yeba, don't you have deodorant on you?"

"The police said they have everything they need. We should head back home." Yongsun understood what shouldering a burden sounded like. She could hear it now, could see it in the way Jeongeun-unnie bore it on her shoulders. It was for that reason alone that Yongsun nodded and turned, urging the rest of her members with her. Hyejin was completely lost in her own thoughts. Yongsun had never seen her like this before.

Wheein took some coaxing; she was still crying, except quietly, now. She hadn't stopped Yongsun from wiping her tears and snot with her sleeve. Yongsun kept her hand clasped in hers for comfort, the other winding around Hyejin's shoulders. They followed after their manager in silence, keeping their heads down and turned away from the pitying stares of the police officers. The carpark of the police station felt much too alive with a winter-tinged wind. Yongsun pulled them closer together, trying to share what little warmth she had left.

There was only her now, to keep them together. Because Byulyi had fallen off the bridge.

---

"What is that?" Yongsun remembered that Byulyi had been laughing, in the van. Wrapped up warmly in her padded jacket and beanie despite Jeongeun-unnie keeping the heater on. Yongsun giggled as she kept her phone out of Byulyi's reach. "Yongdonnie, you can't keep that. I look so ugly."

Yongsun found Byulyi's pouting cute. "That's the point." Byulyi made another whiny noise, which Yongsun ignored. She was in the middle of saving it as Byulyi's contact photo when Jeongeun-unnie spoke up.

"You girls should be sleeping," she said, comfortably merging onto the bridge over the Han River. "You need to be up at 3am. Follow the maknae's example." She gestured with one hand off the wheel to Hyejin, who had rushed to clamber into the passenger seat after their concert and promptly fell asleep. Poor Hyejin had had a full day of schedules. Yongsun had vetoed any music playing so as not to disturb her.

Wheein was close to drifting off too, in the backseat by herself. She made a grumbling noise, and Yongsun took that as her cue to shush Byulyi. The rapper just made an indignant face, pissed at being accused of something that wasn't her fault. She slumped in her seat and looked out the window, while Yongsun returned to scrolling through her gallery to check on all the photos she'd taken that day at their event. She was about to show Byulyi a really good one of Wheein playing with the fans when Byulyi sat up and began tapping on their manager's headrest urgently.