There's always room for another

Chapter 21: 3.8 - the beginning (again)

The first time Yongsun and Byulyi had even approached the topic of coming out to their family and friends, Yongsun had freaked. There were so many things that could go wrong - they were still relatively new to the industry, they were both women, Yongsun had never been with a woman before - and the thoughts had filled her with fear. Byulyi had been understanding, hadn't pushed, but she had felt it was important to ask Yongsun to at least consider it. For their family and friends, if no one else.

Yongsun hadn't spoken to her for a week then, burying herself in her work to cope with the panic and the stress. She hadn't wanted to say no completely to the idea, had grown weary of hiding after the novelty of starting something new, something exciting with this person had worn off.

But she had been afraid.

(Had to deal with her heart racing, and her throat drying, and her hands twisting and pulling and -)

Telling Hyejin and Wheein had been unplanned. In fact, it had almost been their undoing, because their friends had walked in on them arguing about it before a rehearsal. Yongsun had felt out of control then, her panic and anxiety making her say things that she normally wouldn't say, and Byulyi had definitely given it everything she got - standing her ground, her eyes ablaze with indignation at the insinuation that Yongsun didn't believe in them enough to be honest. Hyejin and Wheein had stopped at the doorway, their faces shocked as they listened to the lovers argue. They had heard them from down the hall, they said, hurriedly closing the door behind them when Byulyi had snapped for them to come in. Yongsun had pressed her lips together in distaste at the tone, and began to rail at her for her treatment of their friends, when Byulyi had turned back to her and said - in her heated voice - "Oh so now you give a shit about how we're treating our friends?"

"What are you saying?" They were toe to toe now, Yongsun's hands itching to hit her. How dare she - "I've always cared about them. You can't just take it out on them when we're upset!"

"Yeah. That's right," Byulyi had said bitterly, fed up with the brush offs and the stilted conversations they'd been having all week. They were preparing for their first album comeback and Yongsun was just making it all even harder . They'd both been losing sleep, and Byulyi was obviously at the end of her rope, missing all the nights they both came home to each other and just decompressed together, cuddling in bed before one of them inevitably fell asleep. "You've always cared about them. Cared about what they think. What, they're more important than me now? Than us?"

"You're being selfish." Yongsun had forgotten they had an audience, Wheein and Hyejin furiously exchanging glances and wondering what the hell was going on. "I told you I'm not ready, I -"

"So you shut me out?" Byulyi took another step into her face, and Yongsun had had it. She pushed the rapper away and Byulyi made to push back. "Fucking mature, Yongsun."

"Don't talk to me like that," Yongsun snarled, and before it could get into a proper fight, their maknaes inserted themselves into the situation.

"That's enough!" Hyejin grabbed onto Byulyi's arms to stop her, while Wheein pulled Yongsun away, knowing that this could turn even uglier. "What are you guys doing?"

"She started it!" Byulyi yelled, and Yongsun stilled when she realised the rapper was crying. "She's been fucking ignoring me, in the middle of all this, and she won't fucking admit that it's because -" Realising she'd said too much, Byulyi clamped her mouth shut so tight, Yongsun was surprised they didn't all hear a 'clack'. Byulyi still didn't look happy, and honestly, neither was Yongsun.

"It's none of your business," Yongsun said, pulling herself away from Wheein angrily. She grabbed her things, making to leave. "Practice is cancelled."

"No, it isn't," Hyejin stood in front of her to block her way. "We can't afford to do that."