Gwynriel Fan Fiction

Chapter 10 - Demons

Writing this at midnight even though I have a maths exam tomorrow. Slight TW of maybe a mental disorder. Also I feel like we don’t talk enough about Gwyn’s trauma, cause in this I mentioned it, a lot. But fluff too.

Gwyn was mad. Gwyn was made and furious with Azriel. But most of all, she was sad. Not angry, just sad. Sad to be rejected once more. Sad to be just a person who was a ‘side girl’. Upset with the fact that she didn’t work hard enough to nurture their friendship.

Sad with the fact that she wasn’t enough. She spent an hour crying in her room. Her heart felt like it had been broken into a million more pieces after finally being broken. Being rejected by your mate, hell the one person you loved the most, hurt like hell.

Why wasn’t I enough? Why wasn’t I enough? Could I have done something to prevent him leaving me? Why not me and her? What’s the difference between us? And a sad and lonely voice in her answered, because no one can fall in love with you.

You have too much baggage, which no one wants to bear. You came into this world alone, you’re going to live alone, and you’re going to die alone. You are nothing, you are just an illusion. Your sisters don’t love you, only the illusion you put up for them-

And Gwyn ran out of her room and down the 10000 stairs of the house leading to Velaris. Illusion. Illusion. Illusion. The word kept repeating itself in her mind.

Illusion of being the perfect girl. Illusion of being the girl next door. Illusion of being the sweet girl. Illusion. Illusion. ILLUSION! And the next thing she knew, was that the dark side of her mind took over.

It laughed. She heard the laugh in her mind. She knew it was taking over now. She continued down the steps of the house. Stop! Stop! Please, just please, please stop, she begged her thoughts. But it looked like her thoughts weren’t hers anymore, they were demons.

Demons she thought that she had buried a long time ago. The voice laughed, and started, and that’s when Gwyn knew, she was not in control anymore. She tried to prevent it from taking over her mind, yet she was too weak now. And then the horror began.

You think your sisters love you? They only love the girl who has no demons. They think you’re perfect. You’ve not exactly told them what happened that night in Sangravah, what do you think will happen when you do?

They’ll leave you, finally seeing the pathetic girl you are. Everyone will leave. Like your mate has. You know it’s ironic that you let your sister die in front of you, that you chose someone else before your own blood sister-

but they were-were gonna kill the children, I- I didn’t have a choice-, Gwyn tried speak but the voice was faster. Oh we both know that’s not true Gwyneth. And anyways, karma’s a bitch.

Azriel left you when you needed him the most, just like you left your sister to die when she needed you the most. You’re a traitor, a half breed, a slut who couldn’t save herself or her sister, you’re nothing, you don’t deserve anyone or anything-

And that voice stopped only when Gwyn opened the door and ventured into Velaris. It was raining. Endless tears were running from Gwyn’s eyes, that voice had stopped, but it’s effect, it was still there, rippling like water when a stone is thrown in it.