Anthropophobia → a.i

0.4

Surprisingly Ashton was really busy all the time with being famous, handling his ex (now) who was trying to win him back and make him forget the "closet incident" and also having to balance sports and his grades someone could say he almost forgotten about me.

Not that I cared or minded.

I was perfectly fine in my routine. Listening to music to drown out all the noises of people. Wearing sunglasses to avoid them and just looking down most of the time.

Things got a bit crazy when a girl tried to talk to me last period. I think she was just asking for a pencil but I just couldn't handle talking to her. I pushed one and never looked at her. I left earlier to avoid her trying to give it back too.

Can't people get the memo? I don't want to talk to any of you. You are scary. You intimidate me to the point I feel like passing out. But then again I can't even tell them that.

I was sitting in the library like I always did during lunch time when something happened. Just as I was getting used to my alone time there he was again ready to ruin it and disturb me.

 Of course he didn't see me. Ashton went straight for the other end of the library and I lost sight of him but just his appearance in the room brought an anxiety wave all over me. Other people ignored me and I was more than grateful for that but I am almost sure he will want to chat.

Something I would like to avoid at all cost, thank you.

So I got up and started gathering my things, hoping I will manage to leave the library before he comes back and sees me and for a moment it all goes well. No one is coming and just as I am about to exit the library I hear him call my name. 

Of course I didn't turn and pretended I didn't listen as I left the room either way and tried to find another quite place to eat my sandwich in peace. Needless to say, I failed. Because he followed me to where I was quietly sitting at the stairs.

"Natalie hey, I was talking to you" he said but as per usual my tongue was tied in a knot and I started sweating. Just don't let him any closer Natalie. Distance is good. Keeps you safe.

"You don't talk much huh?" he said  when I didn't even try to talk to him or even nod or something. I simply shrugged my shoulders.

"Can I sit with you?" he said then and tried to move closer.

"No!" I yelled without wanting to. I didn't intend to but I panicked. I need the distance.

"Please leave me alone" I whispered and turned my attention to my knees that were now really close to my chest.

"Why? Did I do something?" he asked but I just couldn't handle his presence anymore. I took my bag and left since he wouldn't.

What's wrong with him?

It's like he wants to know every single person at the entire school even if that person refuses to know him. He's so stupid.

You can't be friends with everybody and you certainly can't be liked to everybody. If I have to act like a total jerk in front of him to get rid of him, I'm more than willing to do so.

"I get you don't like people" he said as he caught up to me. When did that happen?

"I kind of googled your behaviour and it said something like um...Anthropophobia?" he said while scratching the back of his neck. Is he nervous? Did I do something? Oh god.

"It's fear of human company so please leave me alone" I mumbled and he caught my elbow. My eyes widened and he quickly took his hand away from me, realizing that what he did is causing too much stress.

"I'm sorry but I don't want to hurt you" he said softly, keeping his hands next to him and taking a step back.

"I don't know that" I said back and this time when I left he didn't follow me. Thank god I can go to class where I'll be invisible and safe on my own.

*** 

Hey guys. It's been a while.

I'm just really busy with school and trying to finish Addicted but here is a quick update for you.