ETHAN
I navigate the four-wheel drive over the rough terrain, keeping my eyes out for anything that could be an IED. The track was cleared before we came through, but you can never be too sure. Beside me, Seb looks out the passenger window, checking as well. Lance and Jordan are on the back, rifles at the ready, and their eyes constantly scanning their surroundings.
This is what I live for, being out here with my brothers, heading into god knows what. Truth is, if it wasn't for these men with me, if it wasn't for the team, I'd stay over here. I'd put my hand up for every deployment possible just to stay in the thick of it. But that would mean leaving the team.
Jordan has really struggled with this deployment. I know he misses Jane, and being the first time, he's been away since they got together, I can understand that. Jane's a great girl and she's good for him. He has something to go home to now. Me, on the other hand, I have nothing. Nothing left waiting for me back in Perth, back in Australia.
Kate's happy and safe in the states with Chase. I don't need to worry about her anymore. In all honesty, all I have left is some pricks for parents who like to appear out of nowhere just to piss me off. And that's all they are doing, prancing around like they are on holidays, knowing that their presence has me on guard, waiting for them to do something to make my life miserable.
So, if it was up to me, I'd stay right here, far away from Perth, from Australia and my parents. But I'd still want the team with me, and right now, I'm not ready to give that up. It's a debate I have with myself every deployment since Kate moved to the states, and knowing that in less than a week we will be back on home soil, makes it come to the forefront of my mind.
We make it back to base camp in one piece, each of us in some state of exhaustion after our previous mission. Grabbing our gear, we make our way to the tent we have called home for the past four months. Relatively speaking, this has been a short deployment, too short for my liking, but I know the rest of the team is itching to get home and see their loved ones.
In silence, we dump our packs and collapse on the stretchers we use as beds. I know I should get up and shower, the dirt and dust have coated my exposed skin, creating a new layer as it sticks to the sweat and dries there. My hairs a shade of brown instead of the usual dark blonde and full of grit. My body is too exhausted to move though, and I know eventually, Lance will get up, not being able to cope another second with his own body odour.
As if in cue, Lance stands, announcing his need for a shower and leaves the tent, Jordan following shortly after. Seb's breathing, across from me, has become steady and I know he has already succumbed to the fatigue that wrecks our bodies.
I sling my arm over my eyes, trying to block out the light from the setting sun and allow myself to catch some sleep as well, but my mind is full of racing thoughts, not stopping despite my body's pleas.
My mind drifts to the day I joined the team, when I became the fourth to Drake, Seb and Chris.
8 years ago
The last hill seems bigger than the rest, the pack on my back, heavier than when I'd first started carrying it. My body is tired, muscles screaming for me to stop and rest, but I don't, I can't. The finish line is in reach, I can feel it, taste it. Today is the day I find out if I've passed selection, along with the six other men who have made it this far. Six men left out of two hundred who were bussed in at the start of the SAS selection course.
The gruelling course has tested me, physically, mentally, emotionally. They've tried to break me, tried their hardest to make me quit, pushing me to the brink just to see if I'll fall over or keep on going. So many men had reached the point where everything in them is telling them to give up, to go home, and I won't lie, I've been there too, but I stayed. I was determined to see this through, to prove to myself that I can be the best of the best, that I can be the elite soldier I'd dreamed of being when I applied for the SAS.
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Protecting Olivia
ChickLitOlivia "Livy" Perkins hasn't seen Ethan Collins in years. Not since he disappeared, with no goodbye, from her life 11 years ago, leaving her with a shattered heart and a positive pregnancy test. With her ten year old son, diagnosed with a life threa...