Protecting Olivia

CHAPTER ELEVEN

ETHAN

It has been nice having Kate around these last few weeks. I'd told her that they are more than welcome to stay in our spare bedroom, now that Jordan and Jane have moved into the one room, but she was adamant that they would stay at a hotel. I'd persisted until she'd mentioned the noise that her and Chase would make at night. There are some things you just don't want to think about, or hear, when it comes to your baby sister.

I've avoided Livy, which has been easy as I think she has avoided me as well. Anytime we have caught up as an entire group, which happens often, she's never there. There's a big part of me that is disappointed that I haven't seen her, knowing she is so close to me, that we share the same circle of friends and I can't talk to her, can't ask her about her day or our son, can't hold her. But I know it's for the best. The further she is away from me, the safer her and our son are.

My suspicions that the girls know what is going on was confirmed last week. Jane made it obvious when she mentioned our son, Matthew, has found a donor. I couldn't hide my smile, or my relief. Despite not knowing anything about him, other than he is sick, I have been worried about him. How can I not? He is my flesh and blood after all. I am curious as to who it is though, someone just randomly coming forward and donating an organ but wanting to remain anonymous, I can't help but wonder who it could be. The thought did cross my mind that it could possibly be one of my parents, in the hopes to have something over them, but they wouldn't remain unknown, instead wanting to gloat and use it against them at a later date. Besides, there's nothing to say that they know who Livy and Matthew are anyway.

Jane has been spending a lot of time with Livy and Matthew, often talking about their day together when she gets home to Jordan, knowing full well that I am in earshot. I find myself looking forward to listening in to her and Jordan's conversations after she has been around them. Finding out small bits of information about both of them. It's motivated me to stop wallowing in self-pity and try to find an end to this once and for all. At least then, I can meet my son. I'm not naïve enough to believe I stand a chance with Livy again, I was never good enough for her in the first place, but just having her in my life would be a dream come true.

I've upped my investigation on my parents, usually I would just keep an eye on them, make sure they never went near anyone that I care about, now I'm looking into ways to get them out of my life for good. Kate's idea to end them once and for all still slips into my mind, but I don't want to go down that path if I don't have to. I've killed before, but that was in war, in the heat of battle, not cold-blooded murder.

I pull into my driveway late afternoon, having spent most of the day following up on information I've received about my parents. Jordan's car is in the driveway, so I'm assuming both he and Jane are home. I sigh as I get out of the car, knowing that I will probably have to face them being affectionate towards each other. Usually, I wouldn't care, but it just reminds me of what I don't have. And, with Livy being on the same side of the country as me, it's a constant reminder of everything I once had and lost.

Walking in the front door, I spy Jordan sitting on the desk on the far wall of our lounge room., the sound of the small printer spitting out a sheet of paper the only noise filling the room.

"Hey, you're back early." Jordan states after looking over his shoulder and then back to the phone in his hand. I collapse onto the couch, kicking off my boots and resting my feet up on the arm.

"Yeah, did everything I could today." I tell him. Jordan and the rest of the team know everything that I do, they have been helping with the investigation when they can.

"Anything new?" he asks as he opens the top drawer of the desk and searches through, finally pulling out a pair of scissors and picking up the paper on the printer. It's thicker than usual, most likely the photo paper that Jane uses, having taken random photos lately and placed them all over the walls of their bedroom.

"He seems to have some pretty powerful people in his pocket, I just can't figure out how." I tell him as I watch him cut the paper, leaving a large section on the desk.

"Think he's blackmailing them? He asks as he pulls his wallet out of his pocket and places the paper inside it.

"Wouldn't surprise me," I mumble before curiosity gets the better of me. "What the hell are you doing?"

Jordan chuckles as he walks over and flicks open his wallet, showing me a photo of Jane, laughing. With the way her arm is, I can tell he'd cut others out of the photo and just kept Jane.

"Jane sent me a selfie, couldn't resist keeping it on me," he states with a goofy grin. I make a whipping noise earning a quick glare, though the smirk on his face tells me he knows just how whipped he is. "Fuck off, Mate."

I chuckle as he puts his wallet into his back pocket and grabs his keys from the table near our front door.

"I have to go pick up Jane, was going to grab pizza on the way home. You in?" he asks and I nod my head in agreement, knowing I couldn't be bothered cooking anything for myself tonight. The front door shuts as I lay back on the couch, covering my eyes with my forearm. I'm tempted to open the bottle of whiskey that's in the kitchen, hearing it calling my name, but I try to fight it. I've started to depend on alcohol to numb me and I know it's not doing me, or anyone else, any good.

Deciding on a glass of water instead, I drag myself off the couch and head to the kitchen, passing by the desk on my way. A burst of red from the paper still sitting on the desk from Jordan's arts and crafts has me stopping mid step. I reach down and pick it up, noticing the glossy feel under my fingertips. Bringing the photo in to view, my heart stops. Livy sits laughing with a young boy, blonde hair with blue eyes and freckles covering his face. He's also laughing, looking away from Livy and towards who must have been Jane. I can see the similarities between us, the structure of his jaw and the shape of his nose. His blue eyes are a shade between mine and Livy's, the freckles across his nose and cheeks are definitely Livy.

I sink down into the desk chair as I examine the photo closely, my eyes starting to sting and I sniff back the tears that threaten as I see my son for the first time. I trace my finger over his face, smiling at his large grin and happiness in his eyes. My eyes fix on Livy, the small laughter lines that weren't there eleven years ago, the sparkle in her blue eyes, but a tiredness as well. She is even more beautiful now, something I never thought possible.

I feel the tears run down my cheek but I don't bother trying to wipe them away. I know Jordan did this deliberately, leaving a photo I never would have gotten if it wasn't for him. Everything fades away as I stare at the photo, a photo of my family, one I can't be with. But instead of feeling depressed, I feel determined, determined to bring all of this to an end, more so than I was before, so that maybe, I could be in the picture too.