Antumbra - A Lost Cause

That Bitter Smell - Chapter Thirty Four

The following days of training gradually became more bearable, but Arva was still far behind the other two. She tried to ignore it, obviously she wouldn't be to their level, but it nagged at her all the same that she was once again an outcast. Once again she was inferior. It made her want to push herself, but the more she pushed, the less she could do. She tried to find a balance between pacing herself and trying to keep up, and always came up short somehow. The verbal beatings from Constance also did not let up. Every time Arva felt she was getting used to the insults and tough talk, Constance would come up with something new that caught her off guard. It made her angry, made it harder, but she pushed on, if only out of spite. Every night Arva went to bed aching and woke up stiff. She threw up the day before during the gauntlet run, worked to the point of sickness, and had no one to turn to. She wished desperately Marcus would return, if only so she'd have a friendly face to talk to, but mostly so he'd tell her they'd found another way and she didn't have to endure this hell anymore. Now Arva found herself doing push-ups under the constant barrage of orders from the Lieutenant, alongside Kyodai and Boomer who themselves were struggling. Finally they finished, and Arva collapsed into a pool of her own sweat, ready to just pass out. The boys sat next to her, likewise run ragged, the rasp of their heavy panting drowned out only by her own. Their reprieve was short-lived, however, as Arva had barely recovered the feeling in her arms before the Lieutenant started shouting again.

"Can't say I'm impressed," Constance said, standing over the heaving soldiers, "but I suppose you've worked hard enough this week that you deserve a reward. Meet me by the arena, it's time we showed our newest recruit how to fight." Arva barely registered the words in her mind as she rolled over and pulled herself up. She followed the other two as they made their way to what looked like a wrestling ring behind the barracks. It was low to the ground, however, and there was equipment on the wall behind it like body pads and sticks. Arva was drawn to them, and realized they were all ostensibly dummy weapons, like swords with rounded poles instead of blades.

"So," began the Lieutenant, "who would like to be Ensign Arva's first?"

"Ready and willing, sir!" Boomer piped up.

"I'm sure you are," Constance shook her head, "but this is a fight, not a date. Kyodai, get in the ring."

"Sir!" He barked, and hopped over the rails. He took off his shirt, and Arva saw just how unbelievably muscular he really was, and couldn't imagine having to fight someone who was nearly three times her size. He began doing basic stretches and warm-ups as Arva simply stood by and watched, unsure if she was able to go through with this.

"Quit your drooling and get in there, Ensign," Constance snapped her out of it.

"But..." Arva said, "I've never really fought anyone before."

"That's not what I heard," Constance said. She wasn't wrong, even not counting the times Arva wore Antumbra, she recalled the awful day she was almost mugged, and how desperate she was to fight back. She had won, but only by escaping, and her opponent was a skinny punk not much older than she was. Kyodai was tall, fit, and moved with a grace that implied skill and control. He was a real fighter, someone who did this for a living. Still, Arva swallowed her fear and got in the ring. She'd have to learn sooner or later, and this was what she was here for. She thought about her other battles, how rage and fear had taken over, and she fought almost on automatic, and thought that same mechanism would take over again.

Arva decided her best bet would be to catch him off guard, so without any warning she charged and swung with a punch to his gut. It landed off-center, bouncing off of his rock hard abdomen. He countered by scooping her up in one arm, turning her over in his hands like she was nothing, and dropping her on the mat. She wasn't even injured, just dumbfounded, and got to her feet as Boomer snickered uncontrollably behind them.