The Difference

Chapter 17

Fuck!

Had those words really come out of her mouth? Her next brilliant career move should be to write a book. A fitting title would be "How to get rid of the man you love in 30 seconds or less."

Way to fuck up, Lisa. Baby tears are such a turn-on, stupid.

Well, at least he had not run out of the condo this time. Which probably was less due to lack of panic or lack of intense desire to be rid of her and more to him being naked and it being the middle of the night. Still, he hightailed out of the room. Without answering her, mind you. Funny, Michael could turn on the tears himself, but always had a hard time dealing with them from anyone else.

Lisa had tried really hard to keep her messed up state from becoming obvious. She knew how he hated when she got needy, as he called it. Her only excuse was that the past hours had taxed her nerves, and she was still worn out from the latest trip into the sexual universe that Michael reigned over. This is how a vampire ripped out of his protective crypt must feel once the golden rays of the sun crept over the horizon: Slow agony amplified by the knowledge that nothing could keep the sun from rising. Certain death. However, she was a willing accomplice in her own demise. Had she not thrown herself into the golden sun without any protection? Served her right to get burned.

No one had forced her along on this ride. Michael certainly had tried his best to repel her like she was some unwanted, annoying mosquito. She thought she had won. How stupid was that? All she had won was another round of humiliation. Of course he did not resist her. How many guys kicked a naked, willing woman out of their apartments? Especially, one that agreed to do 'anything' they wanted.

Lisa, stop complaining! He held you! He pulled you close. He kissed you after he was done.

No, he was just falling into old patterns. If he had really meant it, he would have assured her he was not making her leave. He would have pulled her into his arms, called her a little idiot, kissed her tears away, and proven to her right in front of the fire that he wanted to keep her close for a long while.

Sure, Lisa, read too many romance novels, dear? What else would have happened, would an orchestra have appeared as a romantic crescendo built? Get real!

None of it mattered anyway. In reality, he had stared at her for what seemed like an eternity. Every millisecond tore another chunk out of her heart and made the pain so much more palpable. Finally, he had broken eye-contact, looking over for another blanket. He wrapped the one they had shared around her tighter, and used the new one to get up.

"Um...I'll be right back, Lise, ok?" With that, he rushed into his bedroom. All she could do was stare after him, trying to convince herself that maybe no answer was better than him kicking her out.

Godammit! Why was she such a fucking idiot? She knew how he hated to be pushed. But, even after the progress made tonight, she felt she had nothing to stand on. Could he not at least give her some form of assurance? She needed to know. Needed to hear him say that he had forgiven her. Unless he had not. Or maybe he never would. Like he said, he was no idiot. Why would he not take what was so freely offered? Did she make it too easy? Did he think she was some cheap piece of ass? The only fact that made he feel slightly better was that she knew that Michael was not the man to take just any sexual offer. Otherwise he'd never get out of bed. And he'd be dehydrated more often than he already was.

Ok, so he does not pick random girls to fuck. But you're not random. He had you before. And he just proved to both of you he can have you any time he wants to scratch the itch. His very personal on-call pussy. Is that what you want to be? And will you take turns with the little legal chick?