love finds its way around

Chapter 13

The aura around isn't comfortable for me. We are in a restaurant Sonia picked she said she wanted to be at an Italian restaurant. Sonia has been trying to keep a conversation with Derrick, I tell you she's really trying her best but Derrick always and still has a one word reply for her or he'd just nod. One thing that is making me uncomfortable is his gaze on me, he'd constantly spare me glances not even concentrating on his date.

"I see no reason you want your PA to be with us on our date Derrick" Sonia says taking a sip from her drink

"It's her duty" comes Derrick simple reply

She drops her cup almost angrily on the table. "Why won't you talk to me"

"I'm talking" he says

"Don't you want to know anything about me?" She ask frustrated.

I feel sorry for her, I won't want my date to go this way not at all but I still have to talk to Derrick.

"I don't" Derrick replies airily

"Fine" she says maintaining her cool again "you have to get ready for our wedding, your dad and mine has concluded on a date for it"

For the first time Derrick lift his face to look at her cause he hasn't since we got here.

Sonia smiles knowing she has succeeded in gaining his attention "it's on the 5th of September"

I look at her too, it's two weeks time. My gaze turns to Derrick who's already looking at me, he looks at me with an expression I can't read and I find myself wanting him to tell me 'it's going to be fine'

I stand up dropping my fork "I need to use the restroom" I say walking away.

I stand in front of the mirror in the toilet. His really getting married to her and it's soon enough what will happen now, what of Carmela....and my feelings.

Maybe Derrick would do something, after their date I should tell him even if it doesn't change anything at least he should know of Carmela.

I walk out of the restroom taking the turn to the main restaurant. I stop walking at the sight in front of me. Sonia's lips is on Derrick's own....they're kissing

My heart feels hot in my chest, I'm stupid. They probably love each other, I should go home. Derrick's eyes meet mine, I rush past them out of the restaurant.

I look at the road trying to hail a cab also trying to stop the tears threatening to fall out

"Lorraine" I hear Derrick call behind me, I turn to him "it's not what you think"

"Is that why you brought me here, to watch you kiss your fiance" I demand, the tears I've been trying to hold falls out

"I wouldn't kiss Sonia you know that. I don't want her Lorri why can't you see that it's you I want, I love you" he says coming close to me   "I love you" he says in a soft whisper

"Derrick" I hear Sonia call behind him. I turn to Sonia and back to him

"There's no use" I say with tears still streaming down my cheeks. "You'd be married soon" I mutter turning away from him. I quickly stop a cab and enter it.

*******
I hold sleeping Carmela in my arms in my room, rocking her. My mind going through a lot of things.

Leigh Anne opens the door entering. She walks over to sit beside me

"How long would you keep going like this"

I told her what happened the night I got back from the restaurant and I don't want to talk about it again neither to see Derrick cause I skipped work for three days now

"I don't want to talk about it Leigh" I say looking at Carmela sleeping gracefully in my arms

"We have to Lorri we have to" she rasps looking at me with a serious expression

"What exactly do you want me to say now Leigh Anne, I can't tell him anymore he's getting married soon. Even if he loves me I love him back but nothing can happen now" I huff looking away from her

She sighs placing her hands on my knee "I know you don't want to see him cause you're embarrassed, you don't know what to say to him when you see him and you're still doubting his love for you"

I look at her, it's no surprise she knows me this well she's my bestie after all

"You still need to fight for your stand, let him know he has a daughter Lorraine" she shakes my knee slightly

"There's nothing to fight for besides Carmela and I are moving on we're leaving town" I deadpan

My phone vibrates beside me. It's Derrick and I'm not going to pick up

"Answer it" Leigh says

"I won't" I defiantly say

She picks my phone answering the call and she hands it to me

"Now talk" she whispers. I shoot her a glare and collect the phone from her. I should talk to him and hear what he has to say.

Hey there!

I'm finally out of high school and I'm happy!

How are you guys? Trust you're fine

Love proxy.