A Man of The Pipis: A SpamtonxReader fic

[[V3NGEANCE]]

His pace goes back to normal as he power-walked across the street. His head twitches slightly and static fills his glasses, almost as if he's running on autopilot. He squeezes you closer to his body, but not enough to hurt you. He may not know his own strength yet, but he's sure to be extra careful with you. You don't say a word as you get closer to the townhouse, not because you knew what was about to happen, but because you feel like trying to stop Spamton was futile. You replayed the fight in the mansion over and over again in your head. Thinking about how easily Spamton was able to destroy such a strong monster.. How powerful he looked in this new body.. You even wondered if that armor was removab- "I have an [brand new] idea.." Spamton chuckled, disrupting your daydream as you stood at the front door. You look up at him and the color is back in his glasses. "Go in and pretend [everything's half-off] alright.. Talk to the [Mangy Mutt], even.. Then tell him you [[FINALLY]] found me. His reaction will be what [measures] his [[PUNISHMENT]]." He chuckled lightly and set you down. Damn was he good at scheming.. You just nodded and walked inside. Chet was sitting at the table with his back to the door. He didn't turn around when you walked in, which gave Spamton ample time to maneuver his large body and wings through the smaller entrance. You walked around the table and sat in front of Chet, who was eating a bowl of ramen and watching videos on his phone. He seemed surprised to see you smiling at him. "H-hey.. What's with the good mood, Y/N? You win the lottery or something?" He mumbled with a mouthful of noodles. You shook your head. "Nah, I wish. I'm just in a really good mood!" You chime, not really acting considering you most definitely were. "Hah, okay, what for?" Chet replied, pausing his video and grinning at you. "Well," you begin as Spamton quietly approaches Chet from behind, "I realized at work, I don't care for grudges, so, I've decided to forgive you!" Chet looked relived, "R-really? I- that's so great, Y'know I'm still really sor-" He started, but you cut him off. "However! I know someone who hasn't just yet." Chet looks confused. "Spamton's still very angry with you, Chet. He told me so." Your expression turns grave as you say this and Chet furrows his brow and scoffs. "Tch- Y/N, you say that like I should be afraid of the twerp. Like, I'm still sorry and I'm glad you found him, sure, but what's that little guy gonna do?" Chet's insincere words die out in the silence of the house. You don't say anything, you merely look just behind your ex-friend. He reads your gaze and turns, then slowly looks up and meets Spamton's cold gaze. "DRAG YOU TO [[HELL]], THAT'S WHAT!!" Spamton's harsh, distorted voice boomed, causing Chet to scream shrilly and stagger back, falling onto the table and spilling the ramen all over his phone. You stand calmly and stroll over to stand beside the robotic behemoth. Chet's eyes glance at you with a look of betrayal. You felt a little guilty that you enjoyed seeing him so afraid. "HEY- Hey, hey, heeeyyy!! Guys, c'mon! Hah- I was joking, I was JOKING.. Damn, you're tall.." Chet whimpered, scrambling backward slightly as Spamton leaned down, but was pinned to the furniture like a cockroach by Spamton's large hand as it slammed down on the monster's chest and curled into a fist, taking a tight hold on Chet's shirt and chest fur, causing him to yelp like a small dog. "Y/N! PLEASE! Tell him to let me GO!!" He pleaded. "Chet, I already told you.. This isn't between me and you anymore! You and Spammy have to settle your differences on your own!" You huff, crossing your arms as you lean against your new partner. Chet chokes out a small sob. My god, he's pathetic.. "I'd love to [kill] you, Chetty pal, but I've got a [better deal]!" Spamton began, "How about you [GET LOST], take [everything must go] that you own [out the door], and see JUST how [[HARD TO BEAT DEALS!]] it is to live ON THE [Hyperlink blocked] STREETS!" He shrieked, his voice shaking with rage and hurt. Good plan, you thought to yourself as he dropped Chet onto the table, causing it to break, now we get a free payed off house and I only have to deal with utilities and taxes and stuff! You watched as Chet bolted into his room, sniffling and mewling like a child as he fearfully packed his belongings. He was halfway to the door when Spamton caught him again. "Oh, and one more thing," He giggled, holding the open glowing maw of his arm cannon right up in Chet's face, which was twisted with fear, "if I ever see your [ugly mug] again, I'm gonna [sell] your hide [to the highest bidder]." He laughed, dropping Chet again. You could have blinked and missed him run out the door, he was so fast.
It was just the two of you now and a broken table. "That was.. Wow." You chuckle softly, walking up to Spamton and looking up at him as you lean against his front. "That was [Fun, Fun, Fun]!" He replied, picking you up. You wrap your arms around his neck and hug him tightly. His arms cross just under your bottom, holding you up and causing you to blush. You lean back, looking him in the face. "Heh.. S-so, what now?" You utter in a whisper. "Not sure, Y/N. Did you have any [bright ideas]?" He coos. Your heart flutters in your chest and your eyes look everywhere but his face. "Awe, you're all flustered~" He giggles, "Let me [help] you out, my [little sponge]." He slides one hand up your back and pulls you close to him, your lips colliding in a kiss. You're surprised and shocked and all manner of emotions are raging in your mind as you slowly melt into the moment and accept this new, exciting life. You and your big shot, together at last.