Linda's Story

Big Girls Do Cry

"It's going to be fun," Linda relayed over the phone. She shot a smile to Frank, holding up one finger. She was trying to get her brother to come to the small party she and Danny were having. It was going to be she and Danny, Danny's family, her grandmother, and hopefully her brother. She knew it was too much to ask her sister and her parents to come. Rosita got along just fine with the Reagans, and Jimmy... it depended on what kind of mood he was in that day.

"But-" Linda tried to interject, but Jimmy wouldn't let her.

Frank watched her facial expressions. She went from hopeful and happy to tears in a matter of minutes. He rolled his eyes, shook his head as she angrily hung up.

"Excuse me," Linda muttered before walking away. She left Frank to awkwardly sit in the living room. She came back after about ten minutes. Clearing her throat she told Frank, "it looks like it's just going to be the Reagans and Rosita for the party." Her voice was still raw from the tears.

"You shouldn't have cried like that."

"Excuse me?"

"Everyone knows crying is just a way to get what you want."

Furious tears stung the back of her eyes as her fists clenched at her side. She wanted to yell at her father in law, or slap him, or do something to show her anger. Instead, she swallowed, took a deep breath, and looked him dead in the eyes. "If that's the way you feel, then I'd prefer it if you didn't attend the party."

She left before he could give her an answer. How dare he tell her that? How dare he insist that being quick to tears was the same as crying for what she wanted?! That wasn't the case at all. Linda had never used her quickness to tears to get what she wanted. Her parents were not he best, but they definitely did not let her get a way with tantrums- which was what Frank was suggesting she was doing.

***********

Danny found Linda in their bedroom, post tears, when he came home from finishing the paperwork he had to do. He sat next to her on the bed, pushed her hair out of her eyes. "What's the problem, baby?"

"Frank."

"Dad? What happened?"

"I was trying to invite Jimmy to the party, he said no. But when I started to cry, Frank said I did it just to get my way."

"Jimmy had to say more than no to get you to cry."

She nodded, "he said that he wouldn't be caught dead at one of my parties, and that I shouldn't even be throwing one because the only person to show up would be you. And you'd only show up to screw me. And when I started to sniffle, he teased me and said you'd leave me, because you wouldn't want to be married to a nutcase who always cries."

"That's terrible! You don't always cry.... that was when Dad said you cried to get what you wanted?"

"I left to cry and to calm down, and when I came back... that's when he said it."

Danny was angry with his dad; he wanted to punch his lights out. But right now, he leaned agasint the pillows and tugged Linda to join him. "I'll tlak to Dad, don't worry."

She was silent for a moment before saying, "Danny? I told him not to come to the party."

"Good, then you beat me to it." He kissed her head as she hugged him tighter. He had some pretty nasty words in mind to say to his father.

***********

"What did you say to Linda to make her cry?" Danny demanded an explanation the next morning.

"What?"

"What did you say to Linda to make her cry?"

"When?"

"Earlier! Yesterday. Before she uninvited you to the party."

"Oh, that. I simply said that being quick to cry was the same as crying to get what she wanted." He returned to his work at his desk.

"How can you say that, Dad? Quick to tears is in no way, shape, or form even remotely close to crying to get your own way. There are so many reasons why someone might be quick to tears."

"Okay, Danny," Frank took off his reading glasses in that way that Danny hated. That was that said Whatever's about to come out of your mouth is terribly wrong and I'm absolutely correct. "Why could someone be quick to tears?"

He wanted to slap his father's smug expression off his face and down all the flights of stairs in the world. "Mitigating circumstances. Getting crap from work, getting crap from her family, getting crap from the in-laws." He pointedly looked at his father as he said that word. "Crap in general. Stress, worries, depression, anxiety. Other forms of trauma, trauma in general. That... thing with feeling emotions very deeply."

"That thing?"

"I can't remember the word..." Danny dismissed the thought with a shake of his head. "Other explanations are personalities, some conditions involving the term neuro- I think. Genetics, possible early trauma... Hormones!"

"She's a grown woman- she should know how to control her hormones by now."

"You're a grown ass man- you should know how to control what comes out of your mouth by now," Danny spat back. "And how dare you imply Linda's a brat? She's the least selfish, self centered person I know! So she cries a lot- so the f*** what?!"

"I never said your wife was a brat."

"By saying she cries to get what she wants, you're implying she's a brat and throws temper tantrums if she doesn't get her way." Danny shook his head, "I thought you were more understanding than this. I guess I was wrong."

He walked to the door and opened it, but stopped. "I don't want you to come to this dinner party. Or the next one, or the next, or the next. If you're going to treat my wife like her father treats her, then you can't be around her. I'm not gonna let her go through that trauma again. Part of being her husband is protecting her, and if that means protecting her from you and your hurtful comments... then so be it."

Frank watched as his oldest angrily walked out of the office. He expected a door to slam, but there was no slamming of doors, only lonely silence.

*************

Frank never did apologize for saying those things to and about Linda. She never expected him to apologize, and once she cried out her feelings about that, she accepted the lack of apology. She accepted the fact that he was never going to see her side of these things, and always make remarks like that. If it was at all possible, she tried to never cry in his presence again. He'd tell her exactly what her father used to tell her.

"Linda, you're way too old to cry like this. You can't cry like this every time you don't like something, or someone hurts your feelings. Stop acting like such a big baby."

No one understood why she was quick to tears- hell, she didn't even know, but she accepted that was the way she was made. And if Frank thought she cried about everything, he was so wrong. There was so much she didn't cry about, so much she held inside because she wasn't allowed to cry about it.