If I Had You

Chapter III

Tauriel POV

 

My mind hadn't decided how to feel about Legolas' presence. Was I mad about him duping his dad, when there wasn't a doubt in my mind that Thranduil would blame me for his sudden disappearance? Was I happy that he cares enough about me to risk it all and come to my side? Was I scared of what lay ahead? Was I suspicious of any other motives he might have for joining me? Was I still blaming him for Kili's death? I didn't know what I was feeling.

It's a good thing that we were riding too fast for any conversation. Ever since daybreak he'd been attempting to talk to me. His presence always followed with the weight of unspoken words. He was behind me currently, three elves down. I turn my head slightly to catch a glimpse of the elven prince.

His hair was flowing behind him like a golden shadow. His blue elf eyes were set intentionally on the horizon, his bow and quiver bobbing up and down to the rocky rhythm of the horse. Even out here in the middle of nowhere, where the only rank was my own, you could almost tell he was royalty, and out of place. He held himself with an appearance of optimism, courage, and personality that the average soldier severely lacked. He stood taller, and oozed leadership. It reminded me of why I had been so fond of him so long ago.

His eyes suddenly meet mine. I quickly snap my face away from his gaze, my cheeks going red. I rock back a bit on the saddle, temporarily off kilter with my horse. I can almost see his playful grin at my clumsiness through the back of my head. The embarrassment flushes throughout me and adds to my confusion. Why the sudden change in the color of my cheeks? The sudden flutter of my heart? What was with that?

"Is something upsetting you, Captain?!" The yell accompanies the trot of horse hoofs as Glindir approaches me. I look over at her cheerful eye, wondering how I had heard her at this speed.

"Why would you say that!?" I shout back, standing up straight and assume the role of leadership. I almost try and intimidate Legolas's personae. Legolas? Why had he suddenly jumped into my mind? If he had helped me when I actually needed him Kili would still be alive.

"You're scowling something awful!" She yells. I suddenly realize the crack in my mask, which only deepens my frown. Glindir chuckles as Morndir joins us.

"Captain, we'll have arrived at Helm's Deep within the hour!" Shouts Morndir. "Shall I inform our troops?"

"Yes, and thank you for the information," I say quietly, not sure if he can hear me. I peek back meekly at Legolas and hope he doesn't notice. He's looking straight at me, which sends another flicker into my heart.

I sigh. What was I feeling?

 

I stop my horse briskly outside the walls of the city. In one swift motion, I leap off my horse and grab my bow and quiver. My feet touch the ground and my head tilts back as far as it can to admire the wall. I'd never seen this city before. Outside of Mirkwood and the areas surrounding the Lonely Mountain I'd never really been anywhere. I whistle quietly as I further study the stone walls of the city.

The walls had to be a couple stories high, at least. It's stony cold walls casts dark shadows across the valley that it bordered. Guard's silver armor reflected the sunlight as they walked across the fort, sure to be watching for our arrival. Helm's Deep was an impressive fortress, one that I'd be glad to serve in. I decide that I better head towards the gate and introduce our company. My men needed rest, food, and water more than anything right now.

"I'm glad that we'll be fighting together again, Captain."

His blue eyes jump in front of mine, along with the rest of him. Legolas's sudden appearance makes me jump. I fall back into my horse, which causes my horse to whinny angrily. I scowl up at his bright smile, the flutter returning to my heart, which notched up my irritation even more.  

"I know the pleasure's all yours." I say cooly. I really don't want to talk to him. He makes one his infamous derpish faces and I roll my eyes. How could someone of such royal status have such a dorky appearance?

"Leggy, I'd request if you'd stop making those faces when addressing me. We need to keep this professional." I turn around as soon as the words leave my mouth. I reach into my horse's bag to gather my things. My hand shakes a bit as I fumble around in the bag, searching for my belongings and papers. Why was he such a-?

"Captain, did you just refer to me as 'Leggy'?" His voice is surprised. I freeze instantly.

Did I really just call him Leggy? Leggy? Really? Where did that come from? I'd never referred to him as that before, not even in the seclusion of my own mind.

Leggy?

I quickly grab my things, scrambling with 'Leggy' behind me. I rip my spare quiver out of the bag and while doing so spill half of the bag's contents. I scoop up the items that fall and cuss under my breath, the act deepening the already bright red on my face. I clumsily put everything away and try and get out of his presence as quickly as I can.

Great, I think. I just referred to a member of royalty as something as trivial and pathetic as Leggy. Awesome.

At the very least, it couldn't get any worse.

 

Legolas POV

 

I can't help but smile as Tauriel rides away hastily, cheeks aflame. She's actually quite cute when she blushes. Leggy? Aside from the obvious issue with its informality, I don't mind it. Face it. I tell myself. You would let her walk Ada's elk all over you. Maybe I liked the name so much because I equated it to some kind of victory over Kili's memory. She gave me a nickname. She payed attention to me. On some level, I realize that my jealousy of a dead dwarf is irrational. But I can't deny that I'm rather proud of 'Leggy', no matter what Ada would say.

With the grin still firmly in place, I ride after her.

When I ride up beside her, I catch the tail end of an unsettling conversation. The rest of our company is milling about uncertainly, some astride their steeds, some leading the animals on foot. Tauriel faces the guard on duty at the gate with challenge and confusion warring in her gaze.

"We were sent by the High King Thranduil of Mirkwood to further secure the victory over Sauron. Of course we are expected!" This last bit is delivered with a slight toss of her head, showing off her long red hair. It strikes me again how beautiful she really is, and something occurs to me for the first time. I have always hated the dwarf Kili for winning her. But I have never considered how lucky he truly was to have her. I snap back to the present as Tauriel's standoff with the guard continues.

"Er, Captain, is it?" The guard is an awkward young ellon who hasn't adjusted to giving orders yet. "I'm sorry, but we have received no notice of your coming, nor do we have need of a fighting force."

Tauriel's lovely face wrinkled in confusion. "There must have been a misplaced message, or perhaps Thranduil's messenger is running late."

"But, ma'am," protests the young ellon. "We have no need for warriors, nothing to fight except the occasional stray Orc."

Tauriel hesitates, then continues. "Whatever the mix-up, my company needs to rest and we have run low on supplies. At least grant us one night's rest while I send a message to Thranduil."

After an awkward pause, the youth allows us to pass, and we are escorted further into Helm's Deep by another guard. This one, in contrast to the awkward youth, is rather old, and does not speak to us.

We reach a set of stables that are overlooked by some rooms in the fort. The guard wordlessly directs Tauriel inside to speak to someone; as the leader of the company, this is her job. The rest of us dismount and begin to unload our packs of supplies, which are far fewer than when we began, from the weary animals. I take the saddle off of mine and turn him loose in the field before turning to help some of the others.

I didn't think this was going to end well.