ARCANUM

CHAPTER 24

JANNIE KIM POV

The sun doesn't sneak into my room because, during this winter, Moscow doesn't get much sun. But my body already has its alarm to wake up at the same time even though I'm quite tired from our intense activities last night. Not only what we do on my couch, but also follow-up activities on my bed. Gentler but with the same pleasure.

I smiled before opening my eyes and welcoming the innocent face and good looks of a man that only he could satisfy me. My smile grew wider as I felt the weight of his left arm wrapped possessively around my hip. I took this opportunity to study at his face and stopped at the small cut above his right eyelid. My finger traced the small wound that made my smile turn sad, remembering the story Rattle told.

Feeling the light touch of my finger on his eyelids, Manoban moved slightly with furrowed brows but was still asleep. He pulled his hand back slightly to reveal his left chest and a gunshot wound on it. Exactly where his heart was. The wound I gave.

My finger left his eyelids and now lightly touched the gunshot wound on his left chest. I'm grateful that at that time, he was wearing a protective patch so my bullet didn't get stuck in his heart. Otherwise, the regret I felt when I thought he died, will never be forgotten and will continue to imprint on my mind and heart. My smile now disappeared from my lips when I touched the wound.

"What are you thinking about?" his hoarse voice made me stare at him for a moment and find his beautiful gray eye staring at me. His real eyes.

Last night, after we had our second intimate session, we talked. He apologized for what he did while completing the mission in Korea. He admitted that he framed and led me according to his calculations and manipulated me to make sure I shot him.

I forgive him. Even long before he apologized last night, I have forgiven him after knowing the truth. But all this time, I've been shrouding myself with hatred for him so I can keep holding on and looking for him. So, I have a reason to look for him. I can't say I like him when I'm not sure how he feels about me. No. I'll keep this first. After all, our current mission is far more important than our romance.

He also told me when I asked about Bambam. Mostly, according to what was told by Jisoo. But from his story, I know and more or less understand him. I can understand him and fall in love with him more. After hearing the full story yesterday, which even Jisoo herself might not know, and understanding how he feels, I feel like I'm getting to know him more and maybe starting to fall in love. Or maybe, I've felt it before? Who knows. To be sure, this feeling can be categorized as love. Maybe it's too soon to talk about love.

A little story about what happened with Bambam. Why was he screaming for me to go back to The Arc before he killed me too? Now I understand. Much more understanding of his feelings than when Jisoo told me this. Maybe because I saw with my own eyes how the pain, sadness, guilt was visible in his eyes and face last night when he told the story. That incident left a deep wound, and I know it won't go away even with time.

The memory of that incident will be etched in his heart and mind, and now in my heart and mind. I felt the pain and the hurt, and this made me want to be near him even more. To make sure he's okay during the missions. I know we haven't agreed on that yet, but after this mission, I'll persuade him so we can continue to partner properly, doing every future mission together. I'll do my best to refuse to be in The Arc the way he wants me to. I will follow him anywhere around the world to do missions.