Still In Love With You

I'll Always Be There

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Sophie

It broke my heart when we got to Amber's house unannounced. It was pretty cold out and looked a bit cloudy, giving us the impression that it may rain again. Amber's dad was just getting home. Instead of resting, he got to work on the yard. He apologized to us because he had been so busy that he had had very little time to work on the yard.

Logan being Logan, took off his jacket, rolled up his sleeves, and took the mowing machine away from Mr. Deveroux, getting to work on cutting the grass. It wasn't a big front yard, so he was probably going to get it done quickly. Amber was busy in the kitchen fixing dinner. Her mom sat in a wheelchair with a warm blanket, watching tv. Part of her face still looked droopy from the facial paralysis that her stroke had caused her. She slowly turned, smiling and waving at us. Even that little gesture took strength in her to move, I went over and gave her a warm hug, getting a smile in return.

It broke my heart seeing her like this, but Amber was still lucky...she still had her mom. It's been four long years since I last saw mine. Believe me... Amber is the lucky one. I wish I could see my mom at least for a few seconds. I miss her terribly.

"How is she?" I asked, concerned with Kenzie's well-being. She smiles apologetically, sighing and looking towards her room. "You shouldn't have bothered coming, Sophie. She'll be fine by Monday when she returns to school." her tone told me something was not ok. I tilt my head and looked at Nate who looked up and smiled. I squeezed his little hand that I was holding. He and I both knew the hesitation in her tone.

She was hiding something, and he and I both knew what was going on. "Amber, tell me what's going on? Why did Kenzie come home early?" she turns away, looking towards her daughter's room. "Does this seem fair to you, Sophie? I was such a horrible person to you when we were young, that karma has to repay me by hurting my daughter. Is that fair to her? She shouldn't be accountable for my wrongdoing, should she?" she sighs, quivering her voice as she takes a seat on the small lazy-boy chair behind her and wipes away a stray tear. "I'm trying to change, Sophie. I work hard, I try and do my best in everything I do. I don't like selling houses, to be honest. But it pays the bills and the mortgage. I have tried so hard to make amends with you and Logan, and everyone I have wronged, but things just keep getting worse." she says, wiping away another tear.

It was hard for me to see her break down in front of me. She had done so much damage to Logan, to my son...to me. But, I somehow find myself feeling pity towards her. No matter how hard I try... I just can't find myself hating her. "Amber, I don't hate you. I forgive you for everything you did in the past. But you will never prosper until you decide to stand up for yourself and your daughter. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Apologizing to the people you wrong is good for healing. That's what you truly need...to heal. Before you can ask others for forgiveness, you first need to forgive yourself. Be at peace with yourself and don't be afraid to stand up for your daughter. She deserves a happy and safe environment. But it all starts with you." we sat for a while to talk. I could tell she was going through a lot, and she was very hurt inside. I was becoming soft with her, to be honest.