stuck with him;; k.v. ✓

25 (jeongguk's perspective, pt. iv)

The University graduation ceremony rolled by and it was the night of the party a day after. I had to leave the next morning.

I shut the door to my car close and trudged towards the venue, already feeling the bass booming, from the club.

I crossed a few of my college mates, scattered here and there, around the building, talking amongst themselves, drinking and smoking.

No one noticed me. Everyone was on their own, with no care for others. So, it wouldn't be a bother for them if I was or wasn't there.

Taehyung would not be bothered too then.

I stopped at the entrance. From the window, I could see Taehyung already inside. He was standing with Jimin, tapping his foot on the ground impatiently, as he looked at his watch, before looking up at Jimin and complaining. Jimin just gave him a nod and a smile. He said something then, to which Taehyung laughed and hit his shoulder.

I smiled bitterly. He looked happy. Like, truly happy without me around. I knew, as soon as he would spot me, his pretty smile would disappear.

And I didn't want that. He was happy and I wanted him to be happy. Moreover, I wanted to feel that happiness too. Be it in the form of moving on.

Perhaps, he was waiting for a new crush. I just hoped he treated Taehyung right, whoever it was.

Looking at his face from a distance for the last time, I left.

I left, without looking back and for a time, long enough for me to get over him. Or so I thought.

⩋

Eighteen months.

That should have been long enough to move on. Living in a rough terrain, amidst uniformly dressed robust men, who had just the same routine throughout the day.

Waking up at the crack of dawn (sometimes having sleepless nights), training, attending meetings, bathing while listening to lame adult jokes cracked amongst the soldiers, having lunch, training some more, having supper, before going back to the quarters and lying in bed until the monotone compelled me to sleep.

It was a totally different life from what I had led, back in Seoul. I learnt a lot from the raw way of living. A body full of ripped skin, broken bones and bleeding wounds and a mind full of practicality, that death was inevitable and more in the life I was leading.

I felt stronger against my emotions.

Though it would have been worse if I was a permanent soldier, my time there ended.

I flew to the States, and lived there for two years, completed post-graduation and spent five more months building the edifice of my profession. And it wasn't a big deal. I made a solid fanbase within the first two months, because the demand was amazing. Calvin Klein, Dior, et cetera, et cetera.

Even though quite a few women showed interest, I never accepted their proposals. I didn't feel like mingling myself with someone. I was good on my own.

Soon, I felt homesick and decided to return to Seoul. It had been a while.

But, as soon as I met him again, I knew I was very much unsuccessful in my motive of moving on.

Just a look at his smiling face and I was doomed. Why did I even agree to attend the party?

He looked beautiful though. And I would lie if I said I didn't miss him.

But, my smile faltered, when I saw a guy with him. It was Jongin. When had they met again? I hadn't seen him since he graduated from high school.