fuck buddies don't act like this (Gojo x Reader)

Chapter 56

It's a funny little thing time.

The way the seconds tick past and the days move forward and yet it's taken you twenty-one years to finally live as an individual within this fast-moving space. To think all your qualms and achievements have been a mind-blowing experience when in reality your mere existence has only been a simple speck in the grand scheme of things. To you the universe is vast and grand and to it you are nothing but a bundle of atoms systematically a means to an end. Your only biological uses are to copulate and spawn bountiful of second-class creations that you and your partner had created by jamming a plug into a socket all the while your copies fend for themselves within this cruel existence.

Your parents whilst very keen on the idea of you finding your other half, getting hitched and hopefully within the year popping out babies faster than KFC hens finish to slaughter. Sooner rather than later. The simple idea of opening your legs to another man is as appealing as the hunky specimen you left behind in Osaka practically drooling to taste you upon his lips. However, you can never in the meantime override the satisfaction of dining alone, sleeping alone and being grateful alone; Morgan is always up for girls' night when it involves popcorn and a facial.

Companionship is already taking up all the space that the void can offer, Morgan's happy smile spreads into the forefront of your mind. Such complicated relationships like romance and borderline sexual ones are only superficial and never as strong as the ones you make for a lifetime; they aren't your top priority anymore in achieving your wildest dreams. The deep breath of fresh air cleanses your lungs as the burden of another soul leeching all your battery life and still having the audacity to brand it as love. The lacking motivation, the effort, the dire exhaustion your bones quaked, and mind split upon thinking about their wants, and their needs over your own now takes a back seat on the curb waiting for you to arrive. For that time will never come. Your choices freed from the leash that bound it, the blubbering puppy that would whine and moan in disapproval of your choices, and your needs now wail in the pound.

Unwanted, unneeded. Just as it should have been.

Who needs an overgrown man-child in their lives anyway?

The speakers' overhead buzzes to life as the head chancellor of the university begins her welcoming speech. Her tamed dark hair flows like draped curtains whilst her academic regalia matches with her golden sash and scarf bestows her the title as if she was royalty. Besides you the unheard whispers of blissful forgiveness of your peers' bleats upon the ring of silence as the main hall echoes upon a pin drop. Your stagnant parents who in the morning were jovial about this celebratory day now masks within the sea of capitalism from suits of grey and black to dresses pinched and ironed straight. Somewhere in the back they sit there now with the others; probably canoodling your future partnership if you fail to conjure up children within the next few years. The woman up on stage stands bright and tall as she boasts about the outstanding achievements and abilities everyone has highlighted within the three years they have studied. For you they have been great whilst dull and somewhat mediocre at best especially when you cringe and critique your poor judgement whilst they were made here.

Dating in general has been a farce stirred by the spoon-fed propaganda that was fed to you as a child, nothing is smooth sailing like eating and shitting sunshine and rainbows. Morgan was right about one thing dating is something you choose to get hurt in, a tug-of-war on who's willing to put out first. Thrice this year heartbreak has rattled your bones and sobered your flesh from making the same mistake a fourth time. No one's that stupid enough that the third time wasn't the charm, why stop at three when there is an infinite number of times you can be impaled in the same spot. Another thing you were lied about.