Attachments

Guilt?

I woke up to the smell of bacon in the kitchen and the tv going. I slipped on my robe and walked to the kitchen seeing Todd with a towel wrapped around him at the stove. I smiled. He felt my presence and turned around smiling,"Morning Queen." I waved and sat on a stool at the bar. He walked over to me and kissed my cheek. God why was I entertaining this? "So, he started, my lawyer emailed me a copy of the divorce papers this morning and it's almost final." I didn't know how to react. I just sat there like a dummy. So he wasn't lying. Maybe he's decent after all. I nodded and got up to pour a cup of coffee as he continued,"I know we got off to a rocky start but like I said, I want you." I sipped my coffee and shook my head saying," I heard you. I just...."Scared?" He finished for me. Silence. I sighed and put the coffee down. "She's pregnant," I stated. "I'll take care of my child regardless but not her," he said easily as he caressed my cheek. Did I take her husband away from her? I thought to myself. No he was unhappy before I came into the picture. I started to look at the floor and he grabbed my chin gently and said,"Hey are you okay?" I nodded and said,"I should get rest I'm fine thanks." "The food is almost ready," he stated as I walked back into the room with my coffee. Minutes later he brought the food in the room and it looked freaking amazing. Almost forgot he was a chef. I ate bit by bit and and he cleaned the dish. Ugh where did his marriage go wrong, I wondered. He seemed so much worth the fight. I got up out of the bed and walked over to my closet. He sat on the edge of the bed and stared at me intently as I picked out clothes to wear. Out of nowhere he said," I don't want you feeling like this is your fault. This was way before you. You just helped me finally be free." I listened to him talk but, in my mind if I was blue, his wife, I would never be able to look at me the same. I would always feel like another woman stole my husband right from out under my nose when I was trying to fix things in my marriage. But I guess that's just being a woman and how we think. I felt like I was in a messy situation again considering I had fallen for this married man and I was enjoying it along the way. Did that make me a horrible person? Of course it did. I finally found something to wear and threw my clothes onto the bed. Todd walked towards me and put his hand on my shoulders gently and said, "I don't need you worrying about my issues I plan on solving today. It's just me and you against the world. We might've went about it the wrong way but we're here now. And I wouldn't change it and neither should you." All I could do was sigh. I'm a home wrecker.