selenophile || remus lupin

chapter sixty five

29 January 1977

4:34 pm

There was another round of apparition classes today. By the end of the lesson, only one student had managed to apparate a few feet into the hoops in front of the students, that unsurprisingly being Ophelia Black.

The teachers in the room were, needless to say, extremely impressed. The marauders all had proud smiles on their faces, Peter being the first one to congratulate her on her show of magical control. Even McGonagall seemed to be boastful that Ophelia was in her house, knowing that she was truly a powerful witch.

After the lesson, Ophelia and the maraudettes went up to the Gryffindor common room, everyone but Ophelia going up to the dormitories to shower, rest, do homework, or hang out. Instead, Ophelia got a book and started reading by the fire.

"No, all I'm saying is that she's really hot!" protested Sirius, walking through the portrait hole alongside the marauders.

"Go to horny jail, Sirius," said Peter.

"Do not pass go, do not collect a hundred dollars," snarked Remus.

"What the fuck does that mean?" asked Sirius.

"Don't tell me you've never played Monopoly?" asked James, looking appalled.

"What even is that?" asked Ophelia, sitting on the couch, listening to the whole thing play out.

"That's it, we're playing Monopoly. Right now." James ran up to the boys' dormitory and within a few moments, came back down with a large, colorful box.

He, Remus, and Peter all took a few minutes to pour everything out and set it all up. Once they did, they showed the twins the metal figurines, letting them choose their characters first. Sirius, no surprise, took the dog immediately. Ophelia reached out and took the thimble, receiving a snicker from Peter.

"What?" she asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

"Of all things, you want to be the thimble?"

"It's used in sewing. It's ladylike," she responded with no hesitation.

"Oh Godric, you sound like mother," Sirius scrunched his nose in disgust.

"I wish you were a boy so you could actually do something useful for this family."

"As women, we are there to look after the men, marry a proper pureblooded man, and have children that will carry on the Black family name."

"You'll never get married, no suitable man would ever want someone like you!"

"Head up, shoulders straight, and smile. Look like a proper lady."

"You're becoming a woman, and you've known your place in our society since you were born, nothing has changed."

"You know how to look like a lady, and what you do is almost never ladylike."

"As a woman, I'm supposed to look presentable, before and after I get married. I'm supposed to care for the men in the family. When I do get married, I am to remain faithful until death, cook, clean, and care for him, and do what he asks unconditionally. I am supposed to birth his children and take care of those children so that they grow into mature adults that marry well, giving our family name more influence."

"I think I'm done playing," said Ophelia, holding in a few tears.

"But we've only just started!" said James.

"It's okay, mate," said Sirius, realizing that he shouldn't have brought up their mother. "It's alright, Phee, you don't have to play."

"Thanks, guys. Let's play another time, perhaps? I think I just need a bit of air." Ophelia walked out of the common room, leaving the four boys unsure of what to do next.

"You guys can keep playing, show Padfoot how to play. I'm gonna go find her, see if she's okay," said Remus, standing up and leaving through the portrait hole after Ophelia.

He caught up with her pretty quickly, seeing that he didn't leave long after her.

"Hey, Phee. You alright?"

"I'm okay," she said, quickly wiping tears from her eyes, not wanting him to see her cry.

Remus saw and realized that there were too many people around to be able to talk with her about anything important and knew where to take her. The two walked side by side in silence all the way up to the seventh floor, Ophelia blindly following Remus, who paced in the middle of a corridor a few times, receiving odd looks from her.

Suddenly, a large door appeared, to which Remus grabbed the handle and let the two inside. It was a cozy room, with a large wall of bookshelves, a fireplace, and a couch.

"Where did you find this place?" Ophelia asked in amazement. "It's so nice."

"This is the Room of Requirement. It appears to those who need it and gives them what they need. I come here when I need some space to think or relax. I thought you needed it right now."

"Thanks, Rem," Ophelia said, tears threatening to fall at his act of kindness mixed with her previous feelings revolving around her mother.

"What's wrong, Ophelia?" he asked, leading them to the couch by the fire.

"Nothing," she lied.

"Don't give me that. We both know that's bullshit. I want you to be completely honest with me. If you don't want to talk about it, just say so. I'm not going to push you to tell me something you're not comfortable talking about. But I also don't want you to lie while you let it build up inside of you, thinking that no one wants to hear about what's wrong. Because that's a complete lie, I care so much, so please, just talk to me."

"It's just what Sirius said about my mother. How he said that I sounded like her."

"You know that's not true. I've never met your mum, but I know that you are nothing like her."

"I know. I just had the realization that she's been brainwashing me. Regulus too. I mean, have you ever heard me say anything about wanting to be ladylike?" Remus shook his head. "Exactly. I don't say stuff like that because I don't think about it, nor do I believe it. But I've been away from them for less than a month, and some of the things they say are just kind of trapped up in my head. I wouldn't have even realized anything was wrong unless Sirius said something about it."

"Hey, look at me. You've been hearing them talk about the way you should act for a month, and now that you're away, it's a bit hard to forget some things that they've said. That's all. You're not turning into them, I know you don't believe what they say, and I know you would never mean anything like that. You just need a bit of time to adjust to life away from them, and you'll stop thinking about how they want you to behave very soon and just subconsciously do what you want."

"Thanks, Rem."

"Is that all you want to talk about?" he asked, once again, pushing her to see if she'd tell him anything that could help him figure out what was going on at Grimmauld Place.

No. I want to tell you so much. I want to tell you about my parents, and Regulus, and Grimmauld Place. I want you to know how much pain I'm in, even after leaving. I need help, please help me.

"Yeah, that's all," Ophelia softly smiled at him.