Ursa Major | Park Jin-Seong

16 • How to Save a Life

I'm pretty much out of ideas for character quotes. Also, it must be November 1st somewhere lol

"Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness. And I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known how to save a life."
-The Fray, "How to Save a Life"

The ambulance abruptly stopped in front of the emergency room doors, causing everyone in the back to violently jolt forward. Jin-Seong watched as paramedics rushed to open the doors and wheel Seong-Min down the ramp and towards the waiting doctors.

"Cho Seong-Min, 24, deep penetrating trauma to the abdomen with a kitchen knife, not through and through, she's already gone through two units of blood. Her left elbow is dislocated."

"Okay, let's get her into surgery right away. Thank you." A senior doctor was immediately taking charge.

The group of doctors rushed off with the stretcher and blood hanger. Another doctor stopped Jin-Seong from pursuing them. "You can wait in the waiting room. We'll give you updates." They led him to the waiting room on the third floor, going all the way to the front entrance of the hospital instead of going through the emergency room.

"Can I also get your phone number, just in case?" Jin-Seong stifled a laugh. He didn't really know how he was going to pick up the phone (literally) but he gave it to them anyways.

He took a seat next to a middle aged man in the waiting room, having no clue what he was to do next.

"Hello." The man greeted him politely, introducing himself as Mujin.

Jin-Seong tried not to wonder why someone was talking to him when he had blood all over him and looked like he just got off work as a butcher.

"Hello." Jin-Seong introduced himself. Mujin stared at him and Jin-Seong did his best to act natural.

"Hm, I thought so." He finally stopped staring.

Jin-Seong raised his eyebrows, signalling for elaboration on what he meant.

"Oh, it's just that my son is a fan of yours. He's in surgery right now. Cancer in kids is awful."

"That really is awful."

"So why are you here? Aren't you supposed to be playing video games for a living?"

"My girlfriend is also in surgery."

"Ah, I see."

An awkward silence ensued. Jin-Seong just sat there, wondering how the awkwardness could possibly hurt more than his sliced up hand.

"Hey, can you do me a favour?" Mujin broke the silence once again.

"Sure." Jin-Seong already had an idea as to what this favour could possibly be.

"Can you visit my son when he wakes up? He would really appreciate it."

"Yeah, I can. I just..." Jin-Seong had no idea what room he would be in, but he just wanted to get away from the awkward situation as soon as possible. "I'll come find him." He got up to leave.

Mujin smiled gently. "Thank you."

"No problem." As soon as he turned around, he spotted the doctor who was here to update him. "Hey, how is-"

The doctor nodded with a neutral expression. "Alive. We're focusing on repairing the artery and other damage from the stab wound for now. It's going to be a while. You should eat."

Jin-Seong didn't really know how to respond. He had no appetite. All the feelings from before came rushing through his head again. He managed to muster a "thank you" and a slight bow. The doctor responded with a nod and walked off.

Jin-Seong was starting to feel dizzy again. With no conversation to distract him, he couldn't help but feel useless. He started walking towards the stairwell door. Guilty. He entered the stairwell, and each one of his steps echoed. Cowardly. His chest felt completely empty, even though he could tell that his heartbeat was speeding.

He climbed all the way to the top, where there were no more stairs and instead just a door. Jin-Seong pushed on the creaky metal handle and stepped out onto the rooftop. The sun had almost set below the horizon line. Breathing in the fresh air was definitely helping clear his head of the dizziness, but the empty feeling was still there. He walked further out, all the way to the edge, where there was a ledge that really wasn't stopping anyone from falling.

Jin-Seong sat down on the ledge, with his legs hanging off the building. He listened carefully to the sounds of cars passing below him. He was aware of how dangerous it was, but what's the worst that could happen, falling to his death? Even then, he would probably deserve it for how he had just left her there. He unwillingly laughed at how ironic it would be if he died here and she lived. This almost threw him off balance, but his fingertips clung onto the ledge, pulling his upper body back onto the rooftop.

It felt like forever as he just sat there contemplating everything that had ever happened in his life. All of it seemed to be falling apart, even though he knew that life would go on tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that. His mind's eye was clouded with a light dizziness that felt like it could sweep him right off the ledge and into the oncoming traffic.

Jin-Seong snapped back to his current position on the edge of a very tall building on the side of the road. How awful would it be if he just fell & died and left her alone? And if she thought it was a suicide? It would probably be worse than if she had watched Nari stab him to death. That horrible scenario managed to convince him to get away from the edge. Jin-Seong clung hard onto the ledge and pulled himself back, reopening wounds on his fingertips.

Blood dripped through the bandages and into the floor, leaving a dark trail from the edge to the door. He pulled the door open, taking one last look at the dimly lit evening sky before going back into the stairwell.