Star Crossed

Unexpected

When I came to, I was lying on the bed with a very bad aftertaste in my mouth. Call it emotional shock, weakness or any other shit, I was very pissed that the strong woman had given way to a wimp. If that was the price to pay, I wasn't near ready to accept it.

Galen's face came into focus; his hand warming mine, his eyes watching me with a worried frown. "Let me guess", I growled. "I fainted like a doll."

His lips quirked, and despite my rolling stomach, I couldn't help but enjoy how this private expression brightened his face. That man had wound his way into my heart so easily that I wondered how I could have worshipped him. He wasn't an idol anymore, just a man, with a brilliant mind and a beautiful smile. He couldn't have been further than what I imagined; he created feelings, and gave his affection so easily.

A pacifist.

A man who loved... his deceased wife. "How are you feeling ?", he asked. And I closed my eyes to avoid tears from spilling from my eyes. The question brought my musings to a halt as the horror of my situation dawned.

Pregnant.

"I'm not ready for this. I will never be ready for this. I can't do it." His face fell, faint eyebrows knitting together. "What do you want to do, Elya ?" My voice wavered. "I ... I could go to Krennic and tell him that I messed up. That you don't know... it is early enough not to have..."

I couldn't say it. Abortion. This seemed like the only safe option here, except that I would lose my credibility... would death be forthcoming ? Galen's face seemed to pale at my words, and he dropped my hand to settle it in his lap. My keen eyes couldn't help but remark how they trembled. Yet, his voice was composed, emotionless as he answered.

"If that is your wish."

My wish ? My fuck... wish !

"What would you have me do, Galen ?", I exploded in anger, straightening on the bed. My head swam, and my stomach heaved once more. "I need a glass of water", I grumbled, ashamed at my outburst. Is that what pregnant women did ? Yell and whine without an ounce of control over their emotions ? It couldn't be me, I couldn't become ... THIS ! I'd never be the plump woman, smile upon her lips, cradling her belly in the sunlight... by the sea ? Couldn't I ?

Galen stood and retrieved a glass of water from the fresher, his footsteps slow on the duracrete. I brushed his warm hand to get the recipient, and downed a mouthful, then another, my gaze lost. "Elya." A tear rolled down my cheek, causing my disgust to flare. "Yes", I murmured.

"Elya look at me." My lips pursed, eyebrows knitting in anguish. But I found the courage to meet his gaze, and was surprised to find understanding. At least, he didn't judge me. "What do you want me to do, Galen ?", I murmured brokenly.

"What I want ?" I nodded, and my body started to shake nervously. My lover's hand reached for my head, and he kissed my brow tenderly. When he pulled back, I could see the light dancing in his eyes. "I want for us to be a family. To live in peace, far away from the empire. The four of us."

My eyebrows furrowed. "What ? With me ?" To his credit, he didn't laugh at my stupidity. Instead, I just watched that flash of uncertainty before he nodded, his features open for me to read. "You. Jyn and our baby."

Our baby. I was carrying his child. Our child. Nurturing it, creating it, cell by cell.

His statement stunned me into silence, and he took the time to explain his vision, for he had caught that I had trouble believing him. "The timing is pretty bad, but Jyn was born while I was in jail, so I am used to difficult circumstances. We are still a primitive species after all." I shook my head at the image, but his fingers laced through mine, grounding me here, with him.