Just as I had entered the building again Timothée came rushing towards me. He stood in front of me and smiled at me. „And how did it go? good?", he asked me, as tears ran down my cheeks. He immediately pulled me to himself and hugged me tightly. „What happened?", he whispered in my ear. „Gilbert.. he kind of confessed his feelings to me", I whispered back. He took a short break before answering with a fake smile: „That's great. You still love him, right?". I hid my face in his shoulder and shook my head. „I still love him, but I didn't want it the way he meant it. He loves me because he can't have Anne.. not because of who I am", I replied and began to cry again. „Oh.. I understand", he said and hugged me more tightly. „Don't worry everything will be fine, he will love you for the person you are, okay?", Timothée said and I looked him in the eyes.
„Do you really mean that? You think I should get together with him?", I asked him, looking for a honest answer in his eyes.
He smiled and replied with: „That's what you want, right?".
„What do you want?", I asked him and he looked surprised by the question. „What? What do you mean?", he asked with an embarrassed smile. „What do you want me to do right now?", I asked him and looked him right in the eyes. „I- I want you to be happy, that is all what I want. When that means you have to be together with Gilbert then you should.. But first he has to respect you for the person you are and love you for who you are not just because he
can't have Anne. I don't want you to be treated badly by him just because he can't decide what he wants. I don't want you to get hurt by him or anyone else. You are the most beautiful and charming girl I know here in Avonlea and you should be treated that way too..", he said with a smile and I smiled back at him. „Thank you Timothée that were really cute words from you.. you are the best friend a girl could have, thank you.. I'm glad to have you on my side", I replied and hugged him.
„No problem..", he whispered into my ear and hugged me more tightly. „Je t'aime („I like you")", he whispered right after that and I looked at him confused. „What did you say?", I asked him grinning. „Oh eh- something in french.. nothing serious really", he said and smiled. „Je t'aime(„I like you") too I guess", I said and he looked at me shocked. „Do you know what that means?", he asked me and I shook my head. Did I say something bad to him? „Oh okay", he said and turned around, took my hand and pulled me to the middle of the room again to dance with him.
Je t'aime.. what does that mean?
———————————————————————
Timothées Point of view
She said it back.. No I can't value her testimony so much. She doesn't know what I said to her in french, but still it was a terrifying but also a beautiful feeling at the same time, hearing her saying it back.
„Je t'aime („I like you")"
„Je t'aime („I like you") too, I guess", she said without knowing what it really meant.
I fell in love with Jules a while ago. I didn't fall in love with her on the first or second or third day I met her. It happened a little bit later, when I started to spend more and more time with her and got to know her more. I always thought she was beautiful, but nothing more, but when I met her outside of school and heard her talking about her favorite things and smiling about it, I was fascinated by her. I don't know how to describe it better. She told me about her tragic family history, her life before Avonlea, her childhood, her twin brother who means the world to her and.. Gilbert. When I heard her talking about Gilbert I was always amazed at how much she actually loved him and how he didn't notice anything about it, even though it was so obvious. After a while, I started to wonder what it would be like, if she said these things that she usually said about Gilbert, instead about me, if she would love me and not him.. It would be so much easier for her and save her so much suffering.
That was the moment I realized I had fallen in love with her and also it was the moment I knew she would never love me the way she loves Gilbert. She has so much passion in her love for him and it was almost unimaginable that she could ever love anyone else, but still I fell in love with her and hoped again and again that she would fall in love with me someday too. She didn't.. not yet. But my hope
wasn't lost.
Even if she could never love me I would always be there for her no matter what. Because she is so important to me. I want to be with her, protect her and spend time with her. That's what love means to me and I just think Gilbert will never love her the way she loves him or the way I love Jules. Because he doesn't value her as much as I do. I really love her with all of my heart.
I love you Jules, why can't you notice it?
The situation from before and her saying „I like you" back, gave me new hope again. When she asked me what I thought she should do about Gilbert, I was very surprised and saw in her eyes something like she wanted me to stop her.. keep her from getting hurt any more and as if she was begging me to confess my feelings to her, but I couldn't. Maybe
I am just a coward or and idiot or maybe both, but she is so important to me that because of my love towards her, I won't even risk our friendship. I don't want to lose her.. She has become so incredibly important to me in the last few weeks as no one else has ever been to me before. This feeling I have for her.. love.. is so strong and new to me that I'm not sure, if I should risk it. Give her my feelings and risk our friendship? If it goes wrong, I could never forgive myself for that.
But sometimes you should also dare to do things in your life. After all, you only live once in this wonderful world and even if there's no hope that she could love me back I have to try it at least. Now it is clear to me.. I will.. confess my feelings to Jules!
Yes! But not today, tomorrow morning with a.. bouquet of flowers..
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Jules Point of view
Timothée and I danced together all night to different songs. It was amazing how he could make me forget everything so quickly. I didn't even think about Gilbert's confession while dancing with Timothée. Only when we took Timothée home with the carriage. He said goodbye to me with a kiss on my hand and then went to his house. Immediately the words of Gilbert came over me again. Don't fall in love with him.. you know why.. That he meant Timothée with that had still been inexplicable to me. I don't love Timothée and he doesn't love me, right? All this confuses me so much I don't know what to believe and what not. My best friend Timothée is supposed to be in love with me?, hogwash.. But what if it is true, what do I do then? I don't love him. Gilbert.. why are you confusing me? Do you really love me? I just can't believe it. The whole time you were in love with Anne, you are supposed to have loved me too? How do you do that? You didn't, right?
You just don't want to be alone.. Oh I don't know what to think anymore. When we arrived at our house, I went to my room with the lie: „I am already tired, I will go to sleep", where I threw myself on my bed and stared at the ceiling. I never thought I would be in a situation like this. It was a strange feeling.
Gilbert he loves me.. No he doesn't love me..
were the only thoughts that went in and out of my head until eventually I fell asleep.
YOU ARE READING
circles 𖧷 gilbert blythe
FanfictionJules moves with her grandparents and her twin Brother „Blayke" to Avonlea on a land, which was owned by their now dead parents. Jules and Blaykes grandparents surprise both of them by making it possible for them to finally go to school. They are qu...
