This Rose Bleeds

Chapter ~Eighteen~

.:~* NATHAN*~:.

He kissed me.

Ryder kissed me.

I didn't stop it. I didn't hate it. I might even go as far to say I may have liked it. It just felt right. Ever since the first time he kissed me in his room, I realized I've been pushing this aside but today he made me face it.

I realized, that for the first time, I decided to forget my messed up life and forget everything that was confusing me, and look at the present. Look at Ryder. For the first time, I felt like truly smiling and laughing.

Why was I smiling?! I was smiling so easily, it seemed impossible. I began laughing and I couldn't stop. Ryder joined as well but it only made me laugh more.

"I'm sorry." I gasped. "I never...I don't...oh my god." I giggled and looked away, covering my face with my cold hands.

"Blame me for making you happy." I could hear the smile in his voice as he pulled my hands away from my face. I felt my face growing insanely red, and it was pretty useless trying to convince myself it was from the cold.

"Let's skate." He pulled me along again, and I think I did a little better. I was able to keep up with his long strides.

I felt like a kid again, learning to skate. If that was his intention, it was really sweet.

I found that time actually does go by fast when you're having fun, because hours later we were leaving the ice on wobbly legs.

"Hungry?" He asked with a huge smile on his face. I laughed and shrugged, checking my watch. "It's already five, I think I should go home. School tomorrow."

He thought for a moment before shaking his head. "I think you can allow me the pleasure of one more hour. Let's go."

He helped me take off the skates. It felt so weird walking normally. We hopped in the car and I watched curiously as we drove a few minutes to a nice restaurant. It was big, with two floors and low lights that gave it a warm feel. He tugged me out of the car and through the doors.

It smelled amazing. He said, "I know it's different than the Red Rose, but I have connections. You'll love the food. I come here all the time." All the time? Well, he is rich, and this place seemed really fancy.

"Reservation for Kenning?" He told the waitress, an older woman in her twenties. She rolled her eyes. "Ryder, we know who you are. Come on."

I glanced at him curiously but didn't ask anything until we were seated in the back of the restaurant.

Instead of introducing herself as our waitress, she left right away to be replaced by a man in his twenties.

"Hello, boys, what will you be having this fine evening?" He asked with a larger than necessary smile.

Ryder groaned. "I told you not to bus our table tonight!" He whined.

"Aw, come on, I had to see who my little bro's been crushing on!" He gave Ryder a side hug and ruffled his hair. Ryder made a 'tch' sound and pouted. He turned to me and grabbed my hand across the table. It felt different now than when he'd touch me before.

"Hello, my name's Steff, Ryder's older, hotter, more publicly established, smarter, college graduate, did I mention hotter? loved by all woman, and men, handsome–"

"The douche bag's my brother." Ryder interrupted with irritation.

"I'm Nat–"

"Nathan, I've been informed." He winked at his brother who 'huff'ed and looked away. Now that I think about it, they did look alike ...with a matching ego. "I'm the owner of this place."

"It's really nice." I said and looked around longingly. I wonder what the kitchen looked like.

"The food's even better. The usual, Ryder?" He nodded and Steff was gone and back in moments with the drinks. He waited at the end of the table with a large smile as we lapped into awkward silence. Ryder groaned and hit his head repeatedly before shouting, "Leave! Now!" Steff winked again and moved on to the next booth.

Ryder sighed in annoyance and I laughed. "Awesome brother you have there."

"Love him, but am so glad he moved out." He smiled.

"I think it's cool to have someone like him around." I thought out loud. He shrugged.

"You don't need someone like him. You have me. Nathan?"

I blinked at him and took a sip of my drink. "Yeah Ryder?"

He took a deep breath. "I figured I should talk this over clearly this time, so you don't get confused or push this aside. Will you be my boyfriend?"

.:~* RYDER *~:.

He spit out his drink. I'm taking that as a good sign. I smiled a little and watched as his face turned beetroot red.

"Wh-what?" He stuttered.

"You. Me. Boyfriend-boyfriend." He wiped his mouth and bit his lip. Oh god.

"Ryder..." He whispered and looked away. "I-I can't. I...I'm sorry. Work, debt... I just can't. I'm kind of... messed up–"

"Don't say that." I muttered and scooted my chair so I was sitting right next to him. I lifted his chin so he could look at me. "You are the most amazing, beautiful, amazing...did I mention amazing? You're my Natey."

He wrinkled his nose and said, "Ew, don't call me that."

"Which part? Natey or my Natey?"

He blushed and his eyes were glossy. But nothing came out, thankfully. I would have cried along with him if he had.

"Just Natey." His face was the reddest I'd ever seen and I loved it.

I felt my heart skip a beat. "Does that mean..."

He bit his lip and looked away. "Yeah." Then he sighed and whispered, "But...if you change your mind I understand. I'm not worth anything, and...if I disappoint you–"

"Don't think like that." He glanced up at me and smiled a little. I leaned down–

But Steff came back. Really, brother? You just had to come back now?

"Bon appetit!" He announced with a smirk. I glared as he set our food down. I decided to stay seated by Nate and began eating, whilst glaring, whilst holding Nate to my side. Yeah, I can multitask.

Steff looked at Nate with a knowing look in his eyes and I saw him blush some more and nudge a little closer to my side. On the other hand, Steff can be really useful!

"Well, I'll be leaving now...Mr. and Mr. Kenneth." This time I choked on the pasta I was eating and began laughing, like, really, really hard.

Nate covered his face with his hands and shook his head slowly. "Oh my god..." He muttered.

I hugged him and nuzzled my face in his hair. He lifted his hands arm awkwardly, not knowing what to do with physical affection. "You know what Nate?"

"What?"

I wanted to say it, but decided it could wait. Even if I've been feeling it for a while now, this must be a lot for him. "Nevermind, I'll tell you later."