chapter thirty-three

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"He was her warmth, she was his peace

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"He was her warmth, she was his peace."

- The Better Man Project

✥ ✥ ✥

FIVE DAYS.

That's how many days I had to push Damien away. He's been waiting for me after school in front of his house ever since the call.

I know I'm a hypocrite. 

I asked the bad boy to be honest with me. Let me carry a part of his pain as well, but as for my problems, I want to face them alone. The only time he really saw a glimpse through my facade was when I needed his help to get my brother away from our house. 

I had no other choice back then.

The worst is that I know he will be by my side, but I can't bring myself to ask for it, not when he deserves nothing but calmness in his life.

I've completely shut him out for five days. And now, it will be six.

It's the only thing I can think about as I head to my car in the school's parking lot, feeling the chilly wind of November on my skin.

I'm so absorbed in my own thoughts, focused on trying to survive another day with this pain that I don't hear someone calling me from behind.

"Adelina!" I furrow my eyebrows when I hear the familiar voice on my back, taking a deep breath before answering it, and when I do, I'm met by forest green eyes that were once the world to me.

I stay despite my mind screaming for me to get the hell away from here.

"Hey, Bella." That's all I say when she stops in front of me with a side smile, playing with a lock of her dark blonde hair. Her outfit is somehow simple, a pair of black jeans and a white sweater, probably because of what happened these past few days and just to think about our friend hurts.

Memories with Eric and the girl in front of me repeat in my head nonstop.

"How are you?" I'm surprised, my lips parting from the sudden question, and she only smiles weakly because of the circumstances.

I was prepared to leave so we wouldn't end up discussing. Now, I can't stop asking 'what happened?' in my mind.

Wasn't she mad at me?

I sigh before answering her, my blood boiling that after all this time, she is coming up to me only today.

"I'm hanging on tight, to be honest." The minute I finish, I know I won't be able to walk away without telling her how I feel, and that's exactly what I do. I take a deep breath before continuing, "I'm sorry, Bella, but I can't deal with this, not right now. You didn't look at my face at the funeral. Fuck, we didn't even discuss what we said to each other at that party."

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