𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝 || 𝐃.𝐌

Chapter 33

I woke up, gasping from a nightmare. The nightmare that I didn't want to see, nor come back

I placed my hand on the chest, taking deep breaths to calm myself down from the frightful dream.

Many parchments, books and my sketchbook are scattered around my bed that I didn't notice that I fell asleep while trying to draw.

I picked up one paper that captured my eyes. A drawing of a handsome blond man with his signature black suit and his innocent smile that I always adore.

I truly miss him, I must say. Though, still unsure about my own feeling even though I knew I desire him.

Do I like him? Or Love him? I was stuck between Love and Like.

I folded the paper and placed it inside my sketchbook, pinning it in between its pages.

But I loath him. I loathed him since that very day we are bound together. No- I do not. Am I?

I groaned, laying back down on my bed, feeling miserable from my thoughts thats were puzzling and confusing my own mind.

True that we are married by force, but why does it seems like there are more to it than just being forced.

In the beginning, I knew we would just be a husband and a wife, ignoring each other coldly for years. But a few weeks ago, it changed, but soon after, it went back again, though it is more miserable than before.

I sat up again, rubbing my eyes with the palm of my hands and slid it up, brushing my hair with my fingers.

Then my eyes caught something. Something that completes every man in suit. His black coat, hanging on the rack nearby my cabinet. The black coat he left me on that evening when I was awoken by that nightmare.

I slipped off the bed, my feet pressing the cold wooden floor of the room and walking to the rack.

My fingers lingered upon the soft fabric of his coat, reaching on its collar as I took it out of the hook.

I brought the coat closer to my chest, pulling it closer to my nose as his scent still lingers around it. The aroma that I was longing for.

Then a light tap was heard on my window, causing my eyes to take a glimpse of the window.

A familiar Tawny owl, knocking on my window in the middle of the evening. It was my brother's owl, Edmon.

I placed Draco's coat on my bed and went to the window, pulling it open as the owl flew in with a letter on its beak and rested on my shoulder.

"Hello, Edmon." I smiled, taking the letter from its beak. "It's been a while since I last saw you." I tapped lightly on its beak. "I missed you."

Edmon snuggled closely to my hair, showing that he missed me too.

Edmon has been like my owl too. One of the many reasons why I didn't let my parents buy me one is because I have grown to love Edmon so much that I didn't want to have my own. My brother knew my fondness towards his owl. He is very much delighted about it.

But if I ever would brought my own pet at school, I would choose to have a dog, but the only problem is...it was forbidden.

I kissed Edmon farewell as it flew out of the window, perhaps going back to my brother or the Owlery.

I closed the door of my window and went back to my bed, sitting down as I opened the letter.

It says,

Dear Sister,

You have been good at putting on your fake smile. Do you think I wouldn't notice? I'm your brother, Y/n. I know you.

I'll talk to you tomorrow morning in my room, after breakfast, and tell me everything. If you need to vent or cry, do so...Know that I'm always here for you.

Your brother,
William

I smiled down at the letter, knowing that my brother would always care for me.

I felt quite relieved on the letter as I laid my body back down on my bed, placing the letter on the end table next to me and pulling the coat closer to my chest, hugging it until I fell fast asleep.

☁︎︎ ❀ ☁︎

After breakfast, I made my way back to the common room to meet my brother as he said in the letter.

Upon walking up at the staircase that leads to the Boy's private dormitories, I crossed paths with Draco, who is stunned to see me.

He looked at me like he's been desperately longing to speak to me. His eyes looks tired, he got bags under his eyes, his skin was paler than usual.

I feel pity for him. I wanted to hug him at this rate, but I couldn't, for he had done something I couldn't forgive.

My eyes fluttered as I looked away from his gaze, and walked past by him, continuing to ignore his presence. But things went on the other way when he suddenly grabbed my wrist, stopping me from walking.

I didn't even flinch to look at him.

"Do you really have to pretend that I don't exist?" He asked, his voice low in the way of sadness.

-Draco's POV-

I was walking down to the common room when I met her on my way.

She looked tired, she looked like she cried endlessly in the evening.

She gazed her eyes away immediately and ignored my presence as she walked past me.

I grabbed her on her wrist, stopping her from walking away from me. She did stop, but she didn't hesitate to not look at me in the eyes.

The first thing I saw on her wrist was the bracelet Michael gave her. For the past few days we've spent, I never saw her wear the necklace I gave her.

"Do you really have to pretend that I don't exist?" I asked.

"Let me go, Draco..." No hint of anger was in her voice, just a voice of feeling hopeless and tired within her.

I slowly let go of her, knowing that today was not the time I could ask for her forgiveness.

I watched her, continuing her steps up before she was gone in my sight.

Hurtful. Very Hurtful.

I truly love her and I know I would do anything just to get her back and earn her trust again...even if it means dying for her.