A Raven Among Crows

Chapter 85: Godless is Time

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General trigger warnings for this story: Language, smut, mentions of rape, abuse, drug use/overdose, violence/death.

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Sydney let her gaze linger on Wendy and Gemma as she made her way back down the hall to Abel's room, crossing her arms with a scoff where she saw Jax sitting in the rocking chair with his head down shamefully.

"That was fucked up." He sighed at the sound of her ever-so-critical voice. "Almost as fucked up as letting that woman anywhere near your son."

"I know, Sydney." He groaned, not bothering to look up. "If you haven't noticed, I'm not exactly the one in charge here." He finally met her eyes.

"You aren't the one in charge of your own kid?" She chastised.

"Look, it's not that simple, okay?" He got to his feet, deciding that if there was anybody who deserved the brunt of his unresolved anger today, it was her. "I can't do this shit without their help. You think I know the first thing about raising a baby?" He unloaded his worries in a weak yell, his arms thrashing around as she stood in front of him completely still - unfazed by the outburst.

"Well then you shouldn't have fucking had one." She shook her head in disgust.

"Like I said... I'm not the one in charge here." He admitted it out loud for the first time - feeling the sting in his heart as the awful words left his tainted lips - and on the day of his son's homecoming, nonetheless.

Sydney nodded slowly as she realized what had really happened there - not having a hard time understanding what it was that he meant as she pondered the situation, easily able to see how Gemma had twisted her claws into it in an attempt to continue growing the family that was constantly being taken from her.

"My daddy did it, you know..." She told him gently as she entered the room. "Raised a kid, made the best out of a hard situation - one that he may not have wanted."

"That doesn't make me feel any better." Jax scoffed. He appreciated her finally coming off of the offense - but it didn't change the predicament that he was in. "If Abel turns out anything like you, I'll know I did something wrong." A small smirk played on his lips.

"Ouch." Sydney felt a challenging grin tugging at her mouth. "If you wanna do this right... Tara is what you need. She loves that little boy... She will give him the life that you want him to have - the life that you'll never be able to give him if you let her have her way." She told him quietly before disappearing as quickly as she'd shown up, leaving him alone with his demons as they played tug of war between what he wanted, and what was easiest - a fight that the former had never been able to win.

Opie perked up when Jax finally returned to the party, getting to his feet and crossing over to where he was standing sheepishly in the dim light beyond the main room. "What happened?" He questioned, concerned by the thick tension that he could feel in what was supposed to be a light atmosphere.

"I got no idea." Jax smiled sarcastically - knowing that his best friend would understand.

And he did. "I'm sorry." Opie chuckled, looking back up with a smug smile. He knew how Tara was...

"Yeah... I can see that." Jax smirked, the first real smile coming to his face. "Come on, let's cut into that cake." He nodded to the kitchen, leading the crowd of people through the entryway where he found Juice.

"Hey, think you can go make sure Tara gets home alright?" He asked the bald man quietly.

"Syd already sent Sack." Juice nodded assuringly, searching his VP's face for an explanation as to why the middle-aged doctor needed a wellness cavalry for the drive to her house that would take less than five minutes.