Reclusive- s.r

seventeen

Driving back home to the house, my mind feels fuzzy. Not in a bad way, per se, but I'm not sure if it's exactly good either. Apart from my music, the car ride is mostly silent, and I'm pretty sure it's because we're both slowly coming to terms about what just happened. The silence is starting to make me uncomfortable so I lea forward and turn the volume up to help alleviate some of the tension.

I don't know why, but I feel strangely nervous now that I know sex is on the table and that it can happen at any given moment. Does that mean I'm going to have to start wearing my nice underwear all the time? Just in case? I'm sure that after today's incident, Spencer's going to go out and buy condoms the first chance he gets, and well, I already happen to have a few that I stole from Celeste, but would I need to buy more?

"Light's green," Spencer informs me, and I jump when a car honks behind me. I loosen my tight grip on the steering wheel and accelerate forward, trying to ease the tension in my shoulders so Spencer doesn't notice how crazy my mind is going right now. "You're tense," he points out.

Well shit, I guess he did notice. Is it that obvious?

"Do you regret it?" He asks, his shoulders dropping, his face morphing into a worried expression. I'm immediately shaking my head, "No. No. Of course not."

"You swear you'd tell me if you did?"

"You would have known if I did," I retort, and I notice him relax slightly, but still looking worrisome. "I don't regret it. You know me, I just tend to get in my head sometimes."

"I want to be in your head," he says with a sigh. "I want to know what you're thinking about."

I don't have the chance to say anything because I'm already pulling into the driveway and taking the keys out of the ignition. Spencer follows me into the house, and when I call out, I get no response, indicating that Celeste is still out, and Grace must be with Heather still. I check my phone to see if any of them texted me, and I got one from Grace telling me she most likely won't be home, but the only thing I got from Celeste was that she was studying with Eli and would be home late.

I refrained from sending a text back teasing her about it, because this is the first guy Celeste has mentioned in months. Since her breakup with Dean, I wasn't even sure if she'd been on any dates, and now I'm almost certain that her relationship with Elias is more than she's telling me.

I take a seat on the couch and Spencer's in the kitchen, grabbing snacks for us both while I scroll for a movie. I'd ended up picking a romcom, because although I consider myself pessimist, I can't deny that I'm a sucky for cheesy movies with a happily ever after. I grab a blanket from the basket on the floor and curl up with it, subtly sticking my nose in the shoulder of Spencer's shirt and smelling his soap.

He walks back in the room with a bag of popcorn, some candy and chocolates. I immediately grab the chocolates because I prefer sweet over sour any day, and Spencer and I are in agreement on that. He scrunches his nose up when he sees the movie queued up on the screen, "A romantic comedy? Really?"

"I like them," I admit quietly. His distasteful expression drops and he's sighing, scooting closer to me and jutting his chin toward the tv, "Start it up." I press the play button on the remote and curl into his side, resting my head on his shoulder and munching on the snack in my lap.

"Why do you like these movies?" He asks after a particularly cheesy part, and I shrug. I shovel a handful of popcorn into my mouth and cover my mouth with my hand, "Guilty pleasure, I guess." He doesn't say anything in return and when I finish chewing my food, I speak again, "Sometimes it's just a nice escape from our boring realities." I don't tell him that I like watching cheesy movies because they give me some hope that maybe everyone really could get their own happy ending.