Secret Thoughts.

Chapter 14- Juan

People are staring us like we have no right to be near eachother. They think because, she's not the prettiest girl and I'm attractive, that we're different, and why would I wanna be near her.  Chrisanna comes toward me and suddenly wraps her arms around me, wanting to be the center of attention of course. Unexpectedly, I feel her lips against mine and I feel her tongue slide down my throat. I can tell she's just doing this for fun. 

"Enough" I say, when I break the kiss, pushing her away. "I don't want you" 

The thought of having sex with her is making me sick right now. I just want to know the mystery behind Paige's clothes. Chrisanna pouts. 

"Fine." She says. " But you'll never find someone as good as me. If you know what I mean..." 

She winks at me. 

I wanna get it on with her but the thoughts are making me sick. Something pulls me back from doing anything to her when I'm with her, but Paige, she's a mystery and I'm waiting to unravel that mystery. I'd do anything to see what's behind it. It gets my mexican blood all hot. The bell rings for school and we walk inside and up to Paige's locker. 

"Paige..." I say, hesitantly. 

Paige looks up into my eyes, revealing unexpectedly gorgeous and soulful chocolate brown eyes that I've never noticed before, gazing at me. 

"Yeah?" she replies. 

I hesitate for a second.

"I-I uh, um want to know if you wanted to come over and watch a movie with me after school. Your choice. Anything?" I ask, hoping she'll agree to it. 

I hate wanting and not wanting to get close to her at the same time. She smiles, her eyes glowin'.

"Yeah, sure. Sounds great!" she says, enthusiastically. 

I feel nervous every time I'm with her. Everytime, I fuck up... not just with her, but with everyone. I was born a fuck up. 

"I-I like hangin' with you. It's pretty cool." I say, hoping she feels the same. 

"I like hanging with you too" she replies back, smiling warmly at me.

We walk up to my class, and then she goes to hers. First and second period class went by quickly, and it's lunch. I wanna ask her if she'll come to mi'ama's work with me. I think she's worrying.