Things Only Go Downhill

Chapter 29

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"On my silent days, I miss you a little louder"
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"Why are you always such a good kid?" Zane laughed as he nudged Cyrus. Cyrus only rolled his eyes before shrugging.

"Morals?" Cyrus chuckled. Zane and Rodney only stared at him in disbelief for a few moments before Rodney broke out laughing.

"You? Morals?" He cackled. "You'll hold someone at gunpoint but you won't drink. You'll steal but you won't smoke... Why doesn't that make sense?"

"Because Cyrus is a good kid" Zane mocked.

"Your voice is giving me a migraine, Zane. Take it down a notch?" A third voice carefully mocked. Cyrus couldn't help smiling a little to himself as he glanced down at Evelyn.

Evelyn had only been hanging out with them for a couple of months. She was new to the neighborhood, new to the school. She was funny and smart. She had her own little quirks just like everyone else. But she was also so damn pretty.

She was tall, almost the same height as Cyrus at 5'11. She had rich black skin and curly hair that fell to her shoulders. She always wore the same few hoodies and jeans to go with it and had a love for drawing on her hands with the sharpies she carried around. Cyrus knew that dating was a terrible idea for someone in his position... But it didn't hurt if they just kissed or hung out sometimes... Right?

"Whatever" Zane muttered as he rolled his eyes. He stared down at the lighter in his hands, flicking it on and off. The light click of it being the only noise for a few seconds.

"Alright, I've got to go to the pawnshop before it closes" Cyrus sighed as he glanced down at the watch he had just stolen. Normally, he'd try and sell it himself if he had the time. But he needed money quick so he guessed he'd just have to haggle with John.

Cyrus was good at stealing... As much as he hated to admit it. He was good at pickpocketing or on desperate occasions he'd mug someone with Zane... He wasn't proud of it. But some things were necessary to keep food on the table. Especially when what was left of his father's life insurance was running out.

"You still coming over later?" Evelyn asked. Cyrus nodded and she smiled as she pulled him in for a sweet, gentle goodbye kiss. Holy shit he was in love with this girl. So fucking in love. He heard Zane and Rodney whistling behind them and he quickly flipped them off as he pulled away and headed off.

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The world was loud in a silent room. The fluffy white comforter was wrapped tight around Silas and although he heard nothing, it felt as if there was a whole marching band playing in his brain.

His head ached, his mind was foggy, his body was too exhausted to do anything but lay and stare and cry. Why did this always seem to happen? And right after he was finally starting to see Dr. Mars too. He had started seeing him in hopes of getting better without the meds. He didn't want to take them... He didn't need them. He was fine. It would go away in a few days or a few weeks or never... Or maybe this time would finally be the time he ended it all.

Why was he sad? He shouldn't be sad. Everything was good. He had Elio, he was in therapy, things were finally good with Maze... Why couldn't he just be happy? Why couldn't his brain just be right for once?