A game of probability where all possible outcomes are bad.
There is no novelty.
We are not the first ever misunderstood people.
There is something deeply hilarious about being on the same team when we have different definitions of winning.
Our scoreboards don't match so we stop keeping score.
This was not what I wanted to say.
I didn't want to talk about the game ending.
I wanted to talk about me and the ramifications of our love affair on me.
Me me me me.
I'm scared of the way I'm happy without pretending.
It's cool, I say.
It's fine. I'm cool.
But there is nothing cool about me. Most days, I want to be the collar on your shirt.
I'm easily scared. I'm scared of dogs, of cats;
Of the joy of being in a room with you. You make rooms better.
Why do love declarations feel like an act of defeat? Maybe because it is. Maybe because I've been defeated.
Maybe I will hide in your arms for a while.
