Our love

Even if there is a future pt.1

I watch him as he pulls the blanket back and adjusts the bed he hasn't been in since yesterday. I know this night will be hard. The self control we both need to have has to be powerful if we're going to sleep beside each other with no action.

I know since I've found out that's he's a Martinez wasn't long ago, I understand that. But every time he looks at me or even comes close, I dissolve into him. I cave and let my curiosity take over my sense.

Before he lays his body next to me he stares over me and digs through my eyes. I know it's weird, unbelievable. But I can feel how his eyes search everything about me and somehow get every right answer. First he looks curious, then when realization pours into him his pupils fade and largen. Eyes have never seemed so loud til now, nobody has ever spoken so clearly, til now.

"I want you to know before I lay down that what we are will only cause problems. This, it will only make it harder to pull away in the future" he informs. His eyes now hard and defensive.

I soften my expression and reach my hand out. When I touch his skin and cup his cheek he tenses aggressively and holds a fist of the sheets.
"Emilio we don't even know if there is a future" I say. The certainty in his eyes becoming irritated.

"There is. As long as you allow me to be like this, I won't let you not have a future. Do you understand that Michelle?" He pleads. The affection that digs into his affection staring at me widely.

I don't nod or shake my head. I pull my hand away and lay myself back down in the position that allows my eyes to graze over the entirety of him.
A faint smile is on my lips and the intensity in him never fades or falls.

"Goodnight" I whisper. The calmness in me never dropping even when anger floods over his face. He shakes his head and balances his body over me in a quick second.

I suck in a sharp breath and shut my eyes with a bubbling feeling in my stomach. "Michelle!" He whispers. Grabbing my hands and pinning them over my head. I control my breathes and feel the pause in his body as he stares at me very very close.

His shaken breath batts against my lips and causes all parts of me to shiver and crumble underneath him. I hold my breath when his finger presses against my bottom lip and pulls it down. "Your beautiful you know. When I first saw you it hit me so hard I couldn't not stare" he compliments. Dipping his face between my shoulder and kissing my throat softly.

I exhale the hold on my lungs and snap my eyes open to his. He's staring at me deeply and painting his fingers over the places I want his lips to touch.
I lean my head forward and push my lips into nothing as he pulls away quickly with a satisfying smile on his face.

"Emilio" I warn. Pouting with the happiness in his eyes. He tilts his head and drops his lips back to the same spot on my throat. I lay my head back and breath roughly as he keeps his lips there for moments with pressure added.

When he's done he licks the spot gently and kisses my ear with only the tips of his lips. As his eyes set back on mine, he's full of desire when I interlock our fingers over my head.

"Kiss me" I whisper. My body becoming impatient with each second of staring at his lips but unable to kiss them. The sides of his mouth curve into a tempting smile, "if we get caught they'll separate us, I can't risk that" he whines. Collapsing all his body weight on me and draping his arms around me.

I let out a gasp of air he pushes out of me. His body sinks mine further into the mattress and his warmth sets into me. "Your laying on me, I'm pretty sure that's just as bad" I say in his ear. My eyes wide and full of excitement.

"Aren't you tired" he mumbles through my neck. I shake my head and giggle with the buzz his deep voice puts around my throat. "At least lay on top of me underneath the blankets, you feel far" I ask.

He grunts lowly and dies as I ask. The entire time he pulls the blankets back and tucks his body back into the same position, our eyes never split or break.
"Happy?" He asks. I nod gently and cross my arms over his neck and shoulder. My fingers play and run through his hair while my other hand traces circles over his bare skin.

Scars work there way around his back like a messy painting. There's only so much I can see but from what I can, some are big and some are small. There all so noticeable as the difference in texture of his skin makes it so easy to spot. I place my pointer finger on the first one and run it up the stretchy feeling of it.

His body stiffens when he realizes what I'm doing. He pushes only his upper half from me and gazes down with complete blankness. "What are you doing" he hums. His voice lingering of fear and guilt. I furrow my eyebrows softly and place my finger on his chin, "your broken Emilio, I see that. Don't be afraid of something that at most I will understand" I say. Staring up into his eyes with no regret but concern.

He nods gently and ticks at his jaw over and over. I can see the question he's feeling in his mind. He's answering questions that I can't understand, contemplating only things he knows of.

When he's finally looking at me instead of his inner self, his eyes are coated with darkness and depth. I suck in a quick breath and feel the temptation of myself rise when he looks over his should with a hard gulp down his throat.