stuck || skins uk

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟒𝟗

⚠️TW SUICIDE ATTEMPTS/SH⚠️

another chapter because I missed posting, enjoy!!
thank you so so so much for 17k and 610 votes you all mean the world to me <33
——

I always thought about suicide the thought of always sleeping in, no bullshit from anyone, not being able to hear the voices in your head, Effy and Freddie were gone that's how I liked it, I rolled up my sleeve and grab the sharpener that had dried blood stained on the metal, It got to the point where I self harmed just because I was bored, not because I was frustrated, sad, depressed, angry

I scrape it across my skin, my skin was dry and I could barely cut through, I put my blade back in my drawer and sigh, I get dressed in a black oversized hoodie and black jeans, I put on my black converse shoes and head out the front door, I never bothered to brush my hair anymore, I just slightly ran my fingers through it from time to time

I head to the pharmacy and have a look around, I go to the medicine section and have a look for pills that would finish the job, I steal some amlodipine, ibuprofen and regular paracetamol tablets, I walk out acting casual, I kept them in my jean pockets, I make my way back home

I walk through the front door and emptied my pockets on the kitchen table, I grabbed a bottle of beer from the fridge and placed it on the table, I grab a spliff from the tin on the table and light it up whilst I empty all the tablets, I throw the boxes near the trash can and grab my phone
——
HI I FOUND MY OLD SK8 BOARD LOL

FROM
EVAN
——

HI WANNA COME SMOKE WITH ME

FROM
EVAN
——

IM HIGH RN

FROM
EVAN

——

:)

FROM
EVAN

——

YOU UP

FROM
EVAN

——

HAVE A NICE SLEEP

FROM
EVAN

——

I sigh at the last message, I felt bad for not messaging him back last night but I didn't let that sink under my skin, I reply with him with a simple ':)' I put out the spliff and drink some of the beer that was sat at my table, I grab a handful of tablets and swallow it all down with beer, I do that until all the tablets are gone, Just die already I thought to myself as I swallowed the last tablet

My stomach started hurting, My mouth was dry and had that weird taste in it from all the tablets, I started to lose feeling in my body, my breathing started to drop, "See you later, alligator" I whispered to myself as I passed out onto the kitchen table

I wake up wires attached to me, I was in hospital, I had a massive headache, I could barely feel anything I look to my left to see Evan, "Shit" I mumbled, My only thought was to try again and make sure I'm dead, "She's awake" Evan said, I looked around nurses where in the room, "Should've shot myself in the head" I think to myself before I pass out again

——

i love this chapter sm!