Deceiving Destiny

Chapter 23: A Kiss upon Briar Rose's Lips

Chapter 23: A Kiss upon Briar Rose's Lips

I sat silently, picking on the ends of my baby pink shirt. My heart was still aching whenever I think of Nate's crying face, he never cried- only now. I hate myself every meter we drove away from his flat, I hate that I left him but that I need to do that- for the both of us.

I was relieved that Tyler stopped cursing like a sailor, I think he finally noticed how I flinched whenever he mentioned the situation at Nate's flat and resorted to giving me the silent treatment instead. I knew he was furious, way beyond mad, but he shouldn't put all the blame to Nate, I was the one who pushed him to do just that- being hurt by the person you love makes you do crazy things, I should know better.

We embraced the silence as the city lights blurred past us, lost in our own thoughts. I didn't want to know what my twin is thinking and for once, I was glad that he wasn't on speaking terms with Blake- I hate to imagine what Blake would've done, he could be merciless when he wanted to be. I knew he detested Nate and I didn't need to give him any more reason to dislike him even more- not that it matters to him.

Thinking of Blake made my body burned with fiery need, every part of me screaming to see him- to get lost in his warm embrace. I wonder if he misses me just as much as I miss him or was he too busy planning his getaway trip with Erica to even think of me? I shook all thoughts of him out of my mind, I need to grieve what Nate and I had lost- it wouldn't be fair on his part for me to jump to someone else's embrace so soon after we've just called it quits. Acting innocent aren't we? Wasn't it the reason you broke apart in the first place? What's stopping you from doing that now? Novelty? Oh please, my conscience scolds me- her fingers pointing at me in mock contempt.

I rested my head against the car seat, trying to succumb to the sleep I know would evade me this night. The events of the past minutes played within my mind once again, torturing me and reminding me of how cruel I'd been.

"Stop beating yourself over it princess. It's done and even though you keep on telling yourself it should not have ended this way, we both know it's coming one way or another. He's not treating you the way you should be treated, he took you for granted and it took him this long to realize that." Tyler's eyes were focused on the road when I looked his way, his jaw still taut in suppressed anger. He maneuvered the gear to the right and I remained silent as he continued, "I disliked him because he reminds me of my former self, the one who abandoned you- the one who chose his dreams over his sister. I knew when I saw him that he'll only bring you nothing but sadness, like what I did. And you're not even compatible in the first place, he doesn't make you laugh, doesn't bring out the best in you. I'm your brother, I'll always want what's best for you."

I knew he cares for me but it was shocking to hear him say it out loud, to know how he sees me- how he wanted me to be happy. Adjusting my seatbelt so that I could fully face him, I mumbled, "I was never angry because you ran for your dreams you know," I smiled when he glanced my way for a nanosecond. "I knew how much you love football, how you'd sneak out every night to go to Blake's house and practice there." At this, his eyes turned wide, glowing in the dark- a starkling grey. "I'd always cover up for you when Dad would check on us, made a makeshift you out of pillows and blankets when he'd poked his head in. I knew how he'd been grilling you to be a lawyer like him and I also happen to know how you hated his job."

I playfully punched his biceps when he made no action to move, his grey eyes still staring at me- they looked much more softer than before. "I'm your twin, I know these things." I tell him as I rolled my eyes at his silliness, that elicit a grin from him. "I was more than happy when you got accepted at the camp, I was more like the proud mom than anything else. I was sad that you'd go so far away from me, I got used to having you in bed- picking on my things and complaining how girly they were but would hug them like a leech when we're sleeping. But I knew you'll come back, I never doubted that- partly because we were still a happy family back then, a huge part was because it was you. When our family came apart, I waited for you- waited and waited and waited- until I grew tired and hated you for not even checking up on me and getting me out of this hell hole."

"I'm sorry, you don't know how much I wanted to see you so badly Madielyn. Damn, I should've tried harder."

"I'm sorry too. I should've known better. Why didn't you tell me about what Dad did? I'd understand."

"Would it make a difference? You're just going to get hurt all the more and I'd never want that for you, ever."

"Yes it is, I would not have treated you so badly like I did. I wouldn't feel left out," I added softly.

Tyler stopped the car on the side out of nowhere, earning a series of honks from angry drivers. He held my hand in his, the sincerity in his eyes pushing straight to me. "I'm here now, I wouldn't let anything happen to you. I'm sorry for making you feel that way all those years ago but I'll change that now. I'm not going anywhere, not without you."

I gasped as I take in his words, he wouldn't leave me again, he won't go back to the camp- not without me. I was happy that he feels that way but the selfless part of me scolds me for letting Tyler felt the need to choose between me and his dreams. "You don't need to do that, I know how important football is to you."

"You're much more important to me."

"And you say you're not a hopeless romantic," I mused, trying to lighten up the mood. He seemed determined as of the moment and I'll let him think I relented for now, I don't want to push the topic between us.

He winked conspiratorially at me, "Don't tell anyone about that? You don't want your brother to get murdered by desperate girls right?"

"You're impossible." I shook my head amusedly at him as I went back to my previous position, my heart not aching as much as it did before. Tyler revved the engine and off we go; this must be the new beginning I needed.

***

The drive back was uneventful, I fell asleep as soon as our sibling talk ceased. I was still feeling guilty about Nate but I could now think rationally about the whole situation- we weren't happy together anymore and I love someone else so it's best to free the both of us. Some might have call me heartless but I think it would be more wrong to stay in a one-sided relationship and fool each other than to be flat out honest with ourselves. Tyler noticed the change in me and even though he wouldn't say it, I could feel that he was glad that I was finally not being too hard on myself anymore.

Instead of going back to the hotel room he rented, we drove back to our house- the cerise paint that I used to dread welcomed me with a newfound feeling, hope.

After we bathe and made ourselves decent for bed, Tyler cooped up with me in my bed and held me just like the old times, a sweet smile wishing me goodnight. I hope tomorrow would be alright.