Donald Trump x Mike Pence

Trumpy Against the Moon Jews

Mike didn't know what he expected to see. Probably every Jewish stereotype rolled into a building with guys dressed as weird Abraham Lincolns outside. Instead, the synagogue looked like his church back in butt fuck Indiana but with a poorly designed star thingy. Satanic, maybe. How could anyone hide something like a fucking space laser in a place like that?

Marjorie marched her way towards the doors, ignoring the bystanders cussing and screaming at them. Donald elbowed Mike and asked him to bring the carpet before following her. She burst through the door like the Kool aid man, not even checking to see if it was unlocked, and threw handfuls of money in the air. When Mike caught up, he saw a Jewish first communion but all the men were wearing little hats. They looked like they saw the devil. He laid the carpet down for Donald to step on, since he couldn't get his shoes dirty with commoner filth. 

"That's Donald Trump..." whispered some church goers. 

"What is he doing here?" whispered another.

Marjorie barreled down the aisle, knocking over the funny priest and the first communion kid before grabbing a rickety old box that was probably stolen from some senior citizen. A look of disappointment came upon her wrinkled face when she opened the box to find some dusty ass scrolls. "What the fuck is this?"

"That is the Torah!" the priest yelled, "How dare you defile a place of worship!?"

"I'm calling the cops!" screamed some guy in the crowd. 

"No no no, this is a very important, historical moment," Donald explained, "very very important. And don't you ever talk to the president of the United States that way!"

"Leave at once!"

Trump ignored the priest, turning his attention towards Marjorie. "You said the space laser was here!"

She stuffed the scrolls back into the box. "It is here! I know it! Q is never wrong."

"You're making me look stupid in the middle of a sin kebab!!" he screamed.

Before Trump could threaten to kill Margorine with his eye lasers that he got from eating radioactive McDonald's, the synagogue doors flew open. Mike cursed and melted because I don't know why not?

It was Rudy Gogloinni and Steve Bannon.

"No!" Steve screamed dramatically.

Rudy hobbled over to Trumpy and placed his hand on his shoulder. "You can't do this, sir. Not yet."

Trump turned away from his victim. "Why not!?"

"Because!" Steve exclaimed, "because she wasn't lying! And we need all the firepower we can get to turn this country into a white state!!"

"Yes!" Marjorine picked herself up, but still looked like a pathetic earth worm with 3 assholes. "I will always stand beside you, because I know you will make this country great again. You have to give me another chance!"

Trump stood silently, using the rusty ass gears in his walnut brain to come up with a decision. Then, he looked at Mike. "What do you think, Mike?"

As much as Mike hated that blonde hoe, she seemed to be a valuable player. In the end, she won't matter anymore. He'll be with big daddy Donald.

"We need everyone we can get."

Trump nodded his head. "Let's go somewhere we can talk in private. All these Jews are making me nervous 'cause they could steal my wallet."

To be continued... maybe