Birthday and Holiday Shocks

Christmas- Wait-

WARNINGS! DO NOT ATTEMPT ANY OF THIS AT HOME!

CURSING IS INVOLVED! MAYBE SOME VIOLENCE! WASN'T CHECKING!

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I decided to do a chapter of Christmas bloopers because that's all I have planned!

Purple: Oh fuck no-

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X: So... they asked me to put up the decorations. However, I've already signed up for cooking duty beside Yellow's baking. So who should I persuade?

Blake: Do Lapis. He's tall.

X: He is taller than me, isn't he-

Blake: Way taller than you. Real quick, why didn't they ask Lapis?

X: I have no idea.

(Meanwhile-)

Lapis, who had been hiding in his room all day, trying to keep Porcelain from tearing down the whole base because of the holiday: Please don't come here... I swear-

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Yellow: Hey Purple, how'd it go?

Purple: Awful! Police interrupted!

Yellow: Oh no! I'm guessing the fun left?

Purple: Yeah... and we were almost successful! We almost had 3000 dollars to give to charity! The police didn't even let us keep the money or send it off! Worst Christmas ever! And the problem was something so stupid!

Yellow: Too loud?

Purple: No... the lead officer gave the excuse that "we were notified of illegal works". If you looked around the room, we were in a church! Pink was even there to overview it! I bet someone stupid made that up. Now isn't that great...

Pink: storming in Purple, wanna help me with something?

Purple: Let me guess... taking those guys out?

Pink: Worse.

Purple: What's worse than- oh- oh....

Pink: You coming?

Purple: Yes please!

Yellow: Oh dear-

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Lapis: Porcelain!

Huh?

Lapis: Quickly grabbing Porcelain from whatever he was doing N-nothing! All under control! Yep! Come on, buddy. Back to your room.

Blake: ................................ sus.

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Blake: Lapis?

Lapis: ...........

X: He's been like this for an hour.

Blake: Just... sitting in front of the door?

Lapis: I'm keeping Porcelain inside so that he doesn't do damage. However... My sweet tooth is getting the better of me and I can smell brownies.

Blake: ... why don't you... I don't know... lock the door?

Lapis: The lock's on the inside.

Blake: Oh...

Lapis: Yeah... sniffs the air  those brownies are taunting me now...

X: Why don't you put a chair in front of the door?

Lapis: I would need to get a chair, now wouldn't I? And that means getting up and moving away from the door.

Blake: Why haven't you called Yellow and asked nicely for a brownie?

Lapis: When was the last time Yellow gave me a brownie while I'm in need of a cure for my cravings?

X: Yesterday, you just won't admit it.

Lapis: No, she gave me that brownie because I did a good job on set and I was having a bad day.

X: ... Let me in there. I'll handle him.

Lapis: No... I got it-

Blake: Dude, you look like death fucking slapped you in the face with a math quiz. Let us handle Porcelain.

Lapis: I've already got it under control.

Blake: Lapis-

X: Lapis, go steal some fucking brownies. You know you wanna.

Lapis: I don't want Yellow to-

X: Lapis.

Dead silence. Lapis then gets up and runs down the stairs. Blake sits in his spot and frowns.

Blake: Wonder how long he sat here for.

X: I just texted Yellow. He's getting that brownie.

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We got the best present ever. Correction, I did. Don't say anything to the others. Let me explain.

All of the rest of the squad works way to hard. I've seen them overwork themselves even though I say no. So, I did something about it.

I kept them outside of the base for a while and even made them stay in a small area just so that I could remodel the base. I know they're going to love it because it'll be better than that stuffy plain office.

Let me know if you want to know more.

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[Hope you enjoyed! Please let me know if you need anything else or if you have ideas for the next one!]