Date Night Stories

Someday

Part 2

Today was the day I died. It's a long time coming and I expected it to come sooner than later. I'm 79 now and cancer got the best of me. I remember my only child holding my hand as I passed peacefully. I used to be scared of death but I'm here to tell you that it's not scary at all. It's a beautiful place to be in.

It was quiet and it wasn't as scary as I thought it would be. I felt like I was floating and I felt light.

Then I saw her, I saw the love of my life in white once again. She looked exactly like she did on our wedding day, she was blooming and smiling as she welcomed me with open arms. I never heard back from her after the divorce. It felt like all the years we were together and in love didn't matter to her. We didn't speak, she just embraced me tightly.

I held her tightly in my arms, the familiar shape of her body and her scent still smelled the same. It's like she never aged. I pulled away from her and I tried to drink all of her in. I missed her for the past 50 years.

Water filled her eyes as she looked at me and I felt my heart drop. She let go of me as she continued sobbing, the peace I felt soon dissipated as I tried to reach for her and I couldn't. I watched as  cried and cried. It felt like hours and I watched the days and night pass by as she cried and eventually she stopped. She stopped and looked at me with the emptiest eyes I've ever seen.

It felt like a movie, as I watched everything she went through when she was with me. How loved she felt in the beginning and I showered her with all the love I could give. Our entire history flashed before my eyes as I stared at her. How she bloomed into the beautiful woman I continued falling in love with everyday. And the fights came along and the hurtful comments and actions. The pride and the anger. And then I watched her as she tried to fix us when I started shutting her out. I watched as she started looking older and shriveling away.

I felt like it was her fault why we fell apart. And she definitely had her faults and I never understood why she kept saying I hurt her and why she nagged all the time.

Then I saw it from her eyes. And I know time can't take back the times I yelled at her and the times I broke her heart with my actions. How I got upset when all she was doing was reminding me to eat and to be safe. I can't take back the times she begged me to spend time with her because I can no longer do that.

I didn't see it and I didn't see her trying. And I guess I stopped appreciating what she did for me and I got annoyed at how she was... Even though it was the same things I fell in love with. I should have seen how much she dropped her pride just to reach out to me and how much she tried to fix us. She wasn't the same happy woman I met, she was sad and a shell of who she was. There are many things we both could have done differently.

Then I learned what happened. I always resented her for not coming back to me or reaching out. I wished I reached out when I wanted to. All she wanted was for me to reach out and show her how much I loved her. How important she was to me and how much she mattered.

I started to cry and I could see the life come back in her eyes. She always did that. No matter how upset she was at me, she would drop everything once she knows I was crying or having a rough day. And she held me in her arms as I wept and broke down. It felt like I cried for hours or days. I don't know how long it was but I just cried it all out and she held me as she caressed my hair.

She took my face in her hands and kissed my forehead, she then put her face close to mine and kissed my lips gently. "I love you" she says as she searched my eyes for a reply.

I messed up when I was with her and she was willing to take me back no matter how much I've hurt her. Is she foolish for doing so? Am I going to keep hurting her, knowing this is the last chance I'd probably get to fix us and make us better... I have the opportunity to finally be with her forever, and I already wasted the time and chance I had on earth..

And maybe in this paradise, I'd be able to love her well just like I did in the beginning, but this time, I'll keep loving her and taking care of her until the end of time. This was all she asked me for, and the fact that she had the opportunity to live in paradise, yet she still waited for me to get my act together and give me another chance... I'd be missing out on someone who will give me everything she has just to make me happy.

She looked into my eyes, and I know when we separated, all she wanted was for me to not let her go so easily, but I did. I didn't want to hurt her and she was hurting me. But why does she keep coming back to beg for more when all I could offer was the bare minimum...?

Because she loves me and she still does 50 years later. So I took her in my arms and I told her, "Never again. I won't let you go again. I made that mistake far too many times"

And I know she wanted me to say that to her. But I couldn't. I couldn't ruin paradise for her even if she begged me to. Because maybe a little part of me, stopped caring.

"Maybe, in another life time?" Her hands dropped and she cried for days and nights. But after that, she looked away and she walked away. She disappeared and I never saw her again.

Maybe in another life time, I'll meet her again and I'll love her well...

Written on December 26 2021...

Original Idea:

After the divorce, they were supposed to meet again in paradise and fall in love all over again. But I realized, this life is all we got and we have to give it our all and our best when we still have the life we have because we don't know when we will lose it.

I thought the idea of two lovers falling back into place was beautiful and romantic. After the break up and the hurt and the separation, but it's also very hard to hope that we will meet again and do it right the next time.

I'd love for lovers to come back and love you right and love you well but sometimes we just cross paths. I hope we are all lucky enough to be able to fall in love again with the same lovers we loved dearly in the future. I hope we get the chance to tell them everything. I think I did and I feel like my heart is breaking into pieces.

With time we all will heal and with time, we all will smile again. And love wouldn't be hurtful anymore. It will be happy and easy.

Thank you so much for reading my stories. This is the last update for this book. I wanted to write another chapter about intimacy but I'll save that for another time.

I hope you enjoyed reading and following me along as I enjoyed writing these pieces. It was an honor to write for you and to love you. I love you, always.

November 03 2018 - December 26, 2021 ❤️